I finally feel like a Mum

[ultrababy]

I am a step- parent to three children. Their Mum passed away many years ago and I have been in their life for three years.
I can't have children myself and I guess have always struggled with my feelings towards being a parent.
I know I love them but didn't know a mothers love towards a child.
Today the eldest passed his GCSE's. To say this year has been a struggle is an understatement. He was diagnosed severely dyslexic and moved schools. Has really found everything difficult but just plods along. Giving no hint of whether things are going well or not.
Well he passed them all. He came home, I ran up the drive to meet him. He cried, I cried. We laughed, we hugged and laughed some more.
I'm a mum. A proud one.

Middle one of to Uni in September and the youngest doing GCSE's. The time has flown by.

Such a beautiful post to read. Their mother will be smiling up in heaven that you are their mum. What a beautiful person you are xx

@EchoFoxtrot

Such a beautiful post to read. Their mother will be smiling up in heaven that you are their mum. What a beautiful person you are xx

I hope so. It took a while to find my place whilst acknowledging their mums legacy. It hasn't always been easy but I feel we did it. They are such strong, capable and loving children. She truly would be so proud of them. As for me, I couldn't love them more if they were my own.

What a wonderful post

How lovely 😍

What a lovely post op, you must feel so very proud. So glad for you.

Having been a step parent for eight years, if there is any advice I could give to those going through the early stages is to have real conversations as to what your partners expectations are of you. My situation differed in that there was no mum present but I still needed to know what part I played in all this. I had to be able to parent in a way that felt natural to me and I always have the support from DP. We have always presented a united front. That said. There have been occasions where I would have done things differently and I have always had the option of stepping back and letting him deal without it causing arguments. He has always accepted full responsibility for sorting out their schedules/ sleepovers and I could choose where I wanted to get involved without being relied upon as the go to person.
I have always been totally honest with the children about everything and when I was stuck and didn't know what to do then I asked them. I explained that they actually didn't have to listen to a word I say but everything I did was always with their best interests and for them to decide. I would say they think of me as a parent but not mum. They have a mum and she's not here but always around if you see what I mean.

This is honestly one of the loveliest posts I’ve ever read. I truly hope if anything ever happens to me that my children find someone as wonderful as you ❤️

What a great update. Hope you feel better soon. x

Wonderful

What a lovely update and what a lovely step-mum you sound!

What a lovely update, hope you're feeling better soon!

Awww

This is a lovely post well done you, congratulations xx

This...actually made me tear up tonight. What a lovely step mum you are and how proud you must be. Not only of your children but you should be proud of you too.

That’s lovely!!

There are lots of different ways to be a mum, and this is a great one.