How best to deal with this

[YaddaYaddaYoda]

DSD (14) got collected by DH last night from the local park where she was staggering around drunk with her mates in the pouring rain. She's now grounded, doing chores etc. I knew nothing about this (I slept through the whole thing) until this morning when DH tells me, and says that DSD doesn't want me to know because she thinks I will judge her.

I'm actually at a loss as how to react. I generally leave discipline to DH (unless it impacts the house or the rest of the family), which he has done. I don't want to rub her nose in it by mentioning it, but now it's this uncomfortable silence where we all know what happened but pretending nothing has happened. And I hate to think that she feels I am judging her. I'm a bit thrown to be honest and concerned that she feels judged - it's one thing to feel embarrassed about last night, but another to feel judged.

Any words of advice?

Just reading this and it sounds like I'm only concerned about me, obviously I'm concerned that DSD is getting pissed. Not sure how best to help.

No advice but if she is worried about you judging her it suggests a couple of things

She values your opinion of her
She knows she did something stupid

If it was my niece (DCs aren't quite old enough for this one) I would ignore the bad behaviour and once she has done her chores hug, call her silly then feed her chocolate

Talk to her about playing the film through to the end. What could have been the consequences of her actions if her dad hadn't rescued her?

Thank you, good advice. All is calm. For this weekend at least...