My daughter is rude to my partner

[KatieJ17]

I have been with my partner for 14 months. We introduced our children quite soon (I have a 6 year old girl and he has a 6 year old girl and 10 year old boy) and within a couple of months were spending the weekends all together. We are now living together and it is, on the whole going well. obviously there are times when his children get jealous about feeling they are sharing their Dad and also I am careful not to discipline his children. The main issue is that my ex partner has told my daughter he doesn't like my partner (he's never met him and refuses to do so), has told her he doesn't like the guy, he's not allowed to shout at her etc. She's taken this as carte blanche to be rude to my partner, tell him she doesn't like him, and respond to simple requests with a "youre not my Dad so you can't tell me what to do". It's quite upsetting as this has all started since her last visit to her Dad . I am nervous about even broaching the subect with him as he is so is so unreasonable/stubborn - that why we're divorced. I've tried to talk to my daughter about her feelings but she just says I should just get back together with her Dad. Has anybody got any advice about how to deal with the situation? I should add my new partner is quite calm about it and also very caring of my daughter. The irony is that my ex has a controlling personality and bad temper (he beat up hs ex wife in front of his other two kids). Although he never abused me, I was a broken woman by the end of our relationship.

[Reality16]

i think we are not thinking of the same definition of the word 'discipline'. To me, disciplining is installing sets of values and principles. oh, ok. Just ignore my posts then.