Ex girlfriend wants to meet me?

[Sparkesx]

Been with partner 6 months (seeing each other a while before) and it's a genuinely lovely relationship.

We plan to move in together some point next year, he has a 3 year old DD.

His ex knows he is with someone else and has requested she meets me before introduced to the DD, which is fine...

I've not had this before, I don't have my own children. What would she want to talk to me about? Where would I meet her? It all seems a little awkward but something that needs doing eventually...

Anyone else been here? Any tips?

I met my DSS' Mum before I met them (2 years ago, been with OH for 3), it was my idea though. I wanted to talk to her about boundaries, how she felt about me disciplining them when in my care, let her get to know me and trust me, etc.

I actually get on really well with DSS' Mum now, she's coming to my parents for xmas (so she can see DSS, obviously). We went for lunch at a coffee shop the first time. It was awkward for the first few minutes because I was so nervous, I was terrified that she would be so horrible but it wasn't anything like that at all. She just wanted to make sure her sons were safe/in good hands/I was serious about sticking around.

Try not to worry! If it goes terribly then it goes terribly - most people don't get on their their partners ex, but this gives you the opportunity to open a friendly line of communication.

That sounds a bit full on reindeer . Didn't you get to know them a bit just as dad's GF before discussing disciplining with their mum?

OP - I'd see what your DP feels about it. If he thinks she'll be friendly and just wants to know who you are, then go along with it, bit keep it reasonably casual if you can. And if possible leave the door open for future communication, so you can exchange friendly words if you're dropping off the kids etc. And remember that she's not interviewing you for a job as a nanny, it's ultimately up to your DP when you meet the DC and what role you play in their lives.

bluelillies - I still don't really discipline them now, I just wanted to make sure I knew her boundaries and suchlike before stepping in. I didn't go in with the intention of wanting to know when I could discipline them, it did come up in our first conversation though! It's so difficult when another person comes into the mix when trying to parent a child. His DC already 'knew' me as "DD and DDs Mum" vaguely before I 'met' them.