Holiday with bf, his DDs and mine!

[wheresthevalium]

OK, you are probably all going to think I am completely off my rocker, but I am looking for some advice. (Also not sure if this is the right place)

I was planning to take my 2 small DDs to Disneyland Paris for a few days in the summer (aged 3 and 5 by then). My boyfriend has just come up with an idea, which I am not sure about, but may well work.

He has suggested that we (me, him, my 2 DDs and his 2 DDs aged 2 and 5) all go together, and also spend a couple of days at his house over there.

I have only met his DDs 3 times, but we have all got on really well, a bit like having our own playgroup really! What I am worried about is, what are my limits as to looking after them and any issues I have with their behaviour?

I already know that he (and his ex) have much more relaxed attitudes as to the level of behaviour they expect compared to me, and obviously they are happy with that, so I know I will have to just try and chill out a bit.

Any advice gratefully received

I think, just by seeing what you have written, that it will be fun, the girls are in the same age group and it will only be for a few days.

With regards to the behaviour, maybe you should have a chat with bf to see what he thinks and come up with a compromise and just remind yourself that it is a holiday and maybe just relax on the discipline for the duration.

This is just my opinion and I'm sure whatever you and bf decide on will be fine.

I hope you all have a brilliant holiday xx

Thanks ATM, bf and I had another chat and I have decided just what you said. I will just chill out and let them go a little bit wild for a few days. It can't hurt, I have them too well trained

Crikey, you will need the valium! That'll be like having two lots of twins. Lots of fun though.

But joking aside, I think as long as you and your bf agree in advance on what is acceptable and what isn't and then both enforce it you can't go far wrong. I find with my step-daughter that she seems to naturally fall in with boundaries I set for dd. She tries it on a lot more with her dad, but with me she's very good. It's like she knows what is acceptable to me and what I pick dd up on and follows that without me having to say anything. I have, however, always made allowances when she first arrives with us, because I always figured that it was hard for her coming from one household with one set of boundaries to another with a different set, and she needed time to adjust. That combined with being very excited about seeing her Daddy meant the first night she could sometimes play up.

When you say what are your limits as to looking after them, what do you mean?

Well, I suppose I meant apart from their safety what level of resposibility would I have to his DD. My instant thought was basically I would be on a similar level to parent, but perhaps not?

I think it will work out well as the children are same ages much easier than having a 2 year old and a teenager for example.

I think let their dad deal with the behaviour side of things, if your two are well behaved you might find the other two will follow suit. Have a lovely time!