the sign of bad things to come?

[juicebaratten]

Just started dating a guy with uni-age children. work schedule is manic at the moment so am thinking a bit on the hoof!

Haven't met the children, but actually did happen to see the elder when was with a group (work).

She was aware that I was in the group and I am intimately involved with her dad, as he is keener on things progressing than me and has told them about me, although I do not feel the relationship is serious enough to formally meet.

Seemed nice enough, but her behaviour seemed very....infantalised? She was skipping round the room (little girl skipping, fairly certain she was not drunk) and embraced and kissed her father and sort of snuggled into his chest (he didn't react). It wasn't any sort of significant reunion for them, by the way.

I'm childfree by choice so don't really know what is normal but is this a bit unusual for the age group, in front of adult strangers on a fairly formal occasion?

She's twenty two and going on to a grad scheme job soon.

Thinking about it, she has called up saying something along the lines of she is going to eat loads and put on loads of weight, when she had a schedule commitment clash.

Also e-mailing him photos of beauty things she is doing to herself like piercings etc.

I suppose maybe its a close relationship and every family's level of PDA and formality is different, but at 21 I suppose I myself was emotionally striking out a bit more, so am wondering if this is going to be an issue.

Both children seem to call lots if we're on a night out together, and I'm wondering if this is going to trouble later on.

sure sounds like trouble to me. Maybe the m is putting her up to it? did he have a relationship before you that was scuttled ? I'd ask him.

Yes. Trouble. :-/

Run (or skip) for the hills.

Father-daughter relationship aside, him wanting to push things along with you so quickly is usually a bad sign.

Oh dear, this is so typical of grown up daughters who are afraid, a new woman in their dad's life, is going to impact on their own relationship with him! You have 2 choices, 1) go along with it but slowly, making sure the DD has no reason to fear you'll take her dad away from her, or 2) head for the hills now!!!!

Might expect that kind of behaviour at 15 or so when they're kind of part adult part child, but 22 . I was living with a boyfriend at that age. My own parents were married! Does sound very immature. But that said, she's 22 and left home, and you say he didn't react, so I'm not sure I'd see it as a reason to run off if you're otherwise happy with the relationship.