Different meals?

[ItsFunnierInEnochian]

Do your DSC eat different meals to your own DC? We eat fairly healthily. Meat lots of veg and fruit 99% of meals made from scratch. DSC only eat oven food. Comments like "urgh whats that" (to slow cooked lamb with carrots and potatoes) and food being pushed around the plate. DH has been just as bad but getting better. Don't think I'm cooking anything exotic? Just bog standard meals. Or what I think are bog standard meals. Casserole. Risotto. Pasta. Roast dinners. Lentil soup. Chilli. Enchiladas. That sort of thing. My DCs eat a large range of food in part due to exMIL being Italian and introducing me to new foods which I've then continued cooking myself. Apparently my kids are odd because they eat most food without complaint. Just putting it out there for other opinions. I never say anything to DSC, by the way.

We have had this sort of issue too. I work 60+ hours a week, and dh works over teatime, so I'm buggered if people are getting separate meals! Some good advice I had on here though was to do "make your own" meals. So, for eg, instead of enchiladas, bung some wraps, cheese, chilli beef, maybe rice, salad, all in bowls on the side, and say, tuck in. That way, they can have anything from a full blown wrap, or just cheese and rice. IME, dsd was much more adventurous on "her terms", ie. one teaspoon of meat...

I think the way forward is to stick to doing what you're doing, There will always be foods that people really dislike, so knowing what they are and avoiding on days dsc are visiting is a good compromise, other than that, the rules are ONE meal. If you don't eat it then nothing else. End of. Nothing hacks me off more than kids who whine that they don't like something whilst refusing to even taste it.

All your meals seem fine, however I wouldn't make children eat lentil soup it's an acquired taste.

If I avoided foods the DSC don't like we'd all be eating Coco Pops, chicken nuggets burgers chips pizza biscuits all weekend, and thats about it.

Ooo the wraps idea sounds good! DSC is quite a bit older than my two (6 and 3, DSC is almost 12) so I've found my usual tricks don't work with him

Yep I totally agree, there's no way I'm cooking different meals. When my Dad and his wife first moved in together when I was 17, she was cooking one meal for her DS one for her DD and then whatever she fancied for herself! Absolute madness.

Soon- I made it for the first time a few months ago and my DCs can't get enough. Tbh I found it bland so chucked a load of chorizo in

I cant believe they don't like pasta - I thought all children like pasta!

Most meals I have found can be split into composite parts in some way, so they can construct their own. Even casserole, do it with jacket potatoes so they feel in control of how much. Agree it isharder with an older child though!

BigPig: not even cheesy pasta with bacon in. One of my favourite lazy comfort foods.

I cook different meals for DSS because he is a veggie. I've enjoyed it, not having done much veggie cooking before, and I often do a big pot of veggie chilli or whatever and freeze into meal sized portions so it isn't too much of a time problem. I had to introduce a lot of things quite slowly, though, as he has a very restricted diet at home. I think BigPig's idea is brilliant (have done much the same myself with home-made pizza, wraps etc) but at 12 I'd go one step further and start getting him to cook his own meals. I've started this with DSS (he is 12, too) and he's really into the idea that he will be able to cook his own meals when he goes to Uni. I've given him a student cookbook of DD's and he picks out something he'd like to try. D'you think yours might go for that? Then it isn't a criticism of his food choices but a preparation for being able to take care of himself (eg not having enough money for ready meals).

Funnier I meant fussy kids/ kids not used to healthy food wouldn't like lentil soup.

Can you make something closer to what they are used to, but a healthier, homemade version for one meal when they visit? So instead of fish fingers and oven chips, what about breaded fish and potato wedges?
I wouldn't go down the lines of separate meals, but think I'd try to include something more to their taste occasionally.

We have this issue too and I used to find every meal time with them incredibly stressful. We were fighting a losing battle and the negative reactions to things were rubbing off on ds.

I have now found 5 meals they will eat and just alternate them every Sat night. Although I still add one new thing in each time for them to try.

I used to have this. And even the suggestion to try something was at first resulted in a melt down. I often thought the neighbours must of wondered what happened at meal times.... Slowly things got better, I tried to include them in the cooking (they were very surprised at how 'real' food was made) it was time consuming and not always possible but it did make a difference....

I never did win with one on the not liking cottage pie, but would happily have mince and mash separate on the plate........

we have this too! dsc's eat chicken nuggets chips sausages mash and pizza. they get made to eat variations and explaining why actually yes they do like is ie chicken Breast is just a bug nugget without the batter on it so you do like it, you like chicken pie from the chippy so you like chicken pie made at home cos it's the same thing, and you like chicken in white sauce as it's just chicken pie with out the pastry.

Dss likes cottage pie and he likes pasta in tomato and herb sauce ergo he should like pasta bolognese as it's a combo of things he likes.

I also finding hiding stuff in food works well. although you need to cap the Disney option of cooking something else for them. if it's something they have never tried I always have an alternative even if it's just cheese on toast, but if it's stuff I know they eat on other guises then they have the choice to eat it or go hungry until the next meal. no pudding, no snacks etc and if it's evening meal then they get nothing til breakfast. took a few mealtimes of tantrums (they are 11 and 9) but the message got through and now they eat virtually anything

Our diet sounds similar to yours but DSD won't try most of it. Make your own fajitas are now a staple though as she loves to make her own. I also have to do the 'daddy's house, daddies rules' routine with DSD other wise DSD try's to tell me she's allowed pudding after no dinner. Or she comes out with well mummy says... Every times she's faced with something she doesn't fancy. It's demoralising if you carefully make food and the lovely little ones won't eat it. My husband says its just being a typical 6 year old. It's reassuring that it's not just me who has these issues. :)

I struggle with this with my own dcs a headache every night and I'm ashamed to say they're 14 and 17. Always been a nightmare one a vegetarian, one only meat. Older one happy to fix herself something but won't be of nutritional value. Problem is when they're older, you can't do the 'go without if u don't eat' routine as they'll just go & buy a bag of crisps...

Oh wow so many in the same situation. This used to really upset me, I'd ask dp if they'd eat whatever I was cooking for mine - he'd say yes, then they world loudly say how horrible it was and not eat.
So. I got all kids to agree on 5 meals they'd all eat and it now goes chicken fajitas on one day, pizza on Fridays (they all have clubs so has to be very quick) then one of the other meals on the Sundays we have them.
It's boring but do you know what, my life is easier and my kids don't mind.
It was much better once I stopped trying to make them eat exciting food!
Won't cook different meals. No way.

In our house it's eat or go hungry. While I would never cook something either my DS or DSD didn't like. DSD (6) has a habit of not liking whatever I put on front of her. So it's easier that way.

Like the wrap idea, may try that. We made our own pizzas one day. I put the bases on the tables, with toppings in different pots, they made there own. It was a hit :)

My SD gets what she's given, this is the same rule for any child in my home. I don't think it's spectacular to give a step child special treatment, and especially if there's other kids, what kind of message does that give imo. SD is allowed to have some things she doesn't like the same as all the adults do. Very rarely we have had attempts to go through a picky phase, but when she realises no amount of pitiful eyes will win her a chocolate based meal she will happily get on with it. Most of what we have is home cooked and we have a lot of interesting breakfasts like fruity porridge or pancakes so generally she really enjoys her food and is a great eater. We get sometimes the hilarious comments about desert 'we always have deserts at mummy's', we just say ah well you're not at mummy's are you. She also says they always have snacks, we say 'we have these big snacks 3 times a day, we call them meals'. We're so mean! Ha ha. but honestly, the rules are always the same, so it is fair and so she knows what to expect and actually that avoids any arguments these days.

DP's youngest only eats a handful of things, even bread has to be the plainest sliced white. Although his DSs have only been over on a few occasions, this has made meals really difficult as what they eat is completely different from anything that we'd ever have at home. The last meal we had together was truly awful as older DSS didn't like the pasta and the youngest wouldn't even eat the bread (never mind the pasta dish) because it had poppy seeds on top. I can't give advice on how to handle this type of situation as when my DS was little, he was told to eat what was on his plate - end of. As it turned out, DP lost his temper etc but ended up his DS a sausage sandwich.

depends how often you have them. We have DSS 6 nights out of 7 so for the sake of everyones sanity we had to work quite hard to get rid of the fussy eating. If it is one or two nights a week I would make something where I am reasonably confident they will eat at least part of it and not make a fuss. If they want anything else afterward point in the direction of the fruit bowl.