Do I tell ds he has a new half sister?

[sallyroute66]

Not sure if this is the right place to post..

My son is nearly 7 and rarely sees his dad, about 30 days over the last 3 years- the matter is in court but outcome along way off just yet. (Violent and abusive)

3 weeks ago I discovered (told by a mutual friend that found out on Facebook) that my ex boyfriends baby has arrived.

Son knew about the pregnancy, he was told by his dad and I knew due date as mentioned in court.

I have not told ds as I expected ex to send a card, pic etc... But nothing has arrived. I checked fb myself and it's right, she's around 3 weeks old.

Do I tell ds or not, I feel like it's not my business, but shouldn't our son not be the last to know?

Yes, I would tell him. But I wouldn't make a big deal of it, just a quiet mention perhaps then redirecting the conversation.

Yes, otherwise you become part of the issue with his relationship with his father.

Yes, tell him. Communication is key now and....for the future. If you're not up front then you collude in some kind of silence which isn't healthy. It kind of making a big deal out of something very simple, if this child isn't mentioned. He/she exists and IS a half-sibling.

I agree, tell him now. If he found out from someone else, I would imagine he'd feel quite hurt and it could damage his trust.

I would tell him yes. She is his sibling and he has a right to know. The news would be much better coming from you rather than a third party.

sally don't know if you're still looking at responses, hopefully this isn't too late. Before you tell him, I would decide & sort the issue of contact between him and new baby as he may want to meet her. If it won't be possible, have a reason. If it may be possible, decide if it's in his best interest.