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Step-parenting

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step daughter issues

26 replies

Melonbreath · 11/06/2014 12:16

I have a 13 year old step daughter. And we have issues.
She only ever rings when she wants something, other than that she doesn't answer the phone. She only comes when something has been organised that is fun, I'm not against doing things for her but we can't afford much now I have dd and am a sahm.
She cancelled a weekend as we said we can't afford to do what she wanted (talking £100 here) and then wanted over £1000 for a school trip. She said unless we pay she can't go. We're paying, I don't know how I really don't.

She cancelled this weekend as her other family are going roller skating and we hadn't planned anything.
It's really hurting my dh that all she wants from him costs. I'm sick of it.
When she's here she's lovely, she never acts like a classic spoiled brat screaming or anything. She plays beautifully with dd, generally leaves her room tidy, puts stuff in the dishwasher and things.
How do we tackle the fact that dad is seen as a wallet to be opened and nothing more? There is no help from her mother's side as they seem to encourage it

OP posts:
Alita7 · 17/06/2014 19:32

Well then Melon if she knows about that then you need to explain that daddy pays mummy some money to help her look after her and daddy buys her some extra things too. But that no one pays you and daddy any money to look after her siblings so you don't have a lot of money left after that. Give her an idea of how much rent and bills cost too (would be good for her to know at her age) i bet she'd be surprised!
Tell her that you like buying her treats and taking her places but that if you spend too much on that you won't be able to buy yourself any food.
So you want to have some lovely trips and get her treats and would like to sit down with her and pick some fun but cheap things to do.
Maybe just maybe she'll give you the time of day...

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