I need a new coping strategy

[SoBloodyFrustrated]

With dh for 7 years, dsd is 10 we have no children and I have never wanted any of my own which I think makes this so much harder.

Was pretty easy until dsd turned 8, anything that came up we could deal with dh has pretty much let me play parent/bad cop the whole time. He's getting better but the Disney ears are still there at times.

I have been struggling for 2 years now with dsd behaviour, we have her 50/50 and I'm tired of being the one who wants some sort of discipline in our home. What she does outside of our home is none of my concern I don't have input into her upbringing except for when she's with us.

We have an on going screen time issue in that she would take her tablet to bed to listen to stories only we would discover her playing on it instead of sleeping. This will result in having her device removed and an hour of tantrums, now she will come up with any excuse to get up and her usual line is 'but I can't sleep'

I am so worn out with the constant night time struggles, dh deals with them in the main but neither of is know really how to stop them. She's had a no screen time for a week punishment but after a few weeks of easy bedtimes she reverts and I'm at screaming point.

She's the same at her mums and I can't cope with it anymore. You can't get her to stay in her room she will follow you, sit on the stairs banging the wall, sit in the middle of whatever room we're in. We have tried ignoring her, removing privileges and so many other things but she's got a bad habit of expecting mum or dad to get her to sleep if she hasn't got her tablet to play on listen to.

Any advice?

My DS would do this if we didn't have a flat rule of no tablets upstairs (mainly due to me wanting to keep an eye on what he's on, he's 4)

Erm.. During the time she's not there (if mum is having the same tribbles I'd also agree same strategy with her) make out the tablet got broken. Disappear it from view, explain it's being fixed.

When she gets it back, impose a downstairs only rule.

I'll probably be back having thought of something else but didn't want to leave this unanswered.
Do you have an internet time off rule? Some friends seem to do well with that one.
DS has a DVD when he's in bed as well as fairy lights, that's his only luxury lol

We have the same issue here, DSS is 4 and would never be away from the tablet given half a chance. We have v strict limit on screen time of 30 mins in the morning and 30 mins in the afternoon but that's it. This is different to his mum's rules but he understands different house has different rules and doesn't kick up too much of a fuss.

Both DS and DSS have CD players in their rooms to listen to stories at bedtime , could you do something similar? That way she gets the story to help her fall asleep but without anything to play on.

She also has a CD player but the problem lies in her not getting her own way. It's exhausting!