Me again. Please bear with me, but I’m finding the advice really helpful (my previous bedroom allocation post). We’re due to move into a house on the 16th January (myself, DP, his two DS’s and my two DS’s) I have found the last couple of weeks a little niggly between as we are trying to do what’s fair for our own children. I think I’m getting cold feet…..
DP came over last night and was saying that he was organising a charity bike event for next year which involves a weekend away with work, he also spoke about a weekend away with his eldest on another bike ride (I’m not sure who’s looking after his other son? Me?) and at the top of his Christmas list was, ‘ski fund’, when I asked what he meant by this he said he was going to ask family for Christmas money so he could take his boys skiing and if I, ‘sorted myself out’, (financially) I could go too. I work part time and cannot afford to go skiing, I own a house that is to be rented out so my rental income plus salary will help pay my share of the rent and bills on the new place. I wouldn’t expect him to pay for us to go skiing but I kind of thought that as we were all becoming a family these sorts of things would be discussed? Holidays, weekends away etc?
Another thing is that at his current place he pays for a cleaner/ironing lady to go in once a week but when I said, ‘Oh does that mean we can have a cleaner in the new place, ha, ha’, he said no, who’s going to pay for that? So I’m assuming the cleaning and ironing are down to me?
He is away for about three weeks on and off in January with work and as he has his boys 50% of the time (every Wednesday and Thursday night, plus EOW weekend) he usually takes them/picks them up from school. He said he is going to get his Mum to come down and cover his 50% so she will take them to school/after school activities. I can’t as my children go to school in the opposite direction so it’s physically impossible. His Mum lives a 2.5 hr drive away so she will stay with me while he is away. He said, 'but it’s ok as it’s nothing to do with me she’ll be doing all the childcare’, well it is something to do with me as she’ll be living in our house while he is away, and as nice as she is, I’ve only met her four times!