SD told her friend not to speak to me :(

[CountryGal13]

Just a little moan about something that's playing on my mind... My SDs friend ( from around the corner from our house) sent me a facebook message last night asking if I knew why SD had fallen out with her. (they're 12) When I said I didn't, she told me that she had sent SDs mum a friendship request on facebook (she slept over there a couple of weeks ago) and apparently sd went mad telling her to stop interfering!? She also said that said friend is closer to me than she is and that she wants her to stop speaking to me! Poor friend is upset and confused.
I can't work out if SDs jealous of me and friend getting along or whether it's because she really dislikes me that much and can't stand it that her friend doesn't feel the same.
I wouldn't say that I'm close to her as there's a lot of jealousy issues (new baby ect) but I really try and make conversation with her whenever she's here and she'll chat back to me.
If we try and speak to her about this then she'll be furious with her friend for contacting me. Not looking forward to tonight's visit.

I think it's a little bit odd that you would be chatting to ANY 12 year old on FB to be honest. The friendship issue is between your SD and her friend, who are both 12 - I would honestly stay well out of it!

Her friend occasionally sends me messages asking if sd has arrived yet ect and I reply. That is all. I didn't feel like I could ignore her when she asked me a direct question last night. There's no general chit chat between me and this friend.

fair enough, I really wouldn't engage though - let them sort it out x

I intend to. I have no interest in getting involved in an argument between two 12 year old girls! My worry is why my sd is upset that her friend speaks to me and whether that means she is jealous and wants more interaction with me or whether she just hates my guts and wants her friend to feel the same way. When I say that I 'get along' with her friend I ment that she is always polite and chatty with me, sd often isn't. Sorry if my original post was confusing.

Country,dont read to much in to it.sd has even said she didnt want her facebook friends with her mum,at 12 dont think i would av been best pleased either.

I'm not sure if it's a facebook thing or not really. When they were together at our house last week the sd ignored my hello and wouldn't look me in the eye when I spoke to her, whereas her friend was her usual polite self. Suppose Im just a bit worried that she's trying to encourage her friends to be rude to me and why she'd feel the need to do that.
Ellieb, I do massively over think things when it comes to the dsc and take things very personally. I have no one to speak to about step issues so sometimes even the little problems I have along the way find their way on to here. I also have no experience with children/teens so just nice to get another perspective really.
I'll try and forget about it now and put it down to normal tween behavior :) x

I think I'd be inclined not to take that personally but to conclude that DSD is going through that awkward phase when you try to pretend that adults don't really exist in the world that you and your friends inhabit. And that maybe her friend is a bit more relaxed about it all.

So DSD doesn't know how to cope with her friend wanting anything to do with either you or her mum and is therefore avoiding speaking to you as she doesn't have the maturity to articulate what she's unhappy about or sort it out any other way.

Thanks Purple! Phew, these kids are complex :) x

Just the girls, boys are much more straightforward