Do any Step Parents have Parental Responsibilty Rights?

[ToddlersRFab]

My ExH wants his new wife to have PR for our DS (4) in case of a medical emergency.

We live approx 10 minutes drive from each other, therefore no reason in my eyes why this is required.

I just wondered if any step parents have this and why.

Resident SPs do for education - for medical I don't know.

Dsd lives with me and I don't, dp doesn't for ds either.

IfIwas - we have shared residency of DS, and DS spends majority of time with me, therefore there is no reason for it, either educational or medical.

I feel there is a more sinister reason for this demand.

I would just say no. I can't see any reason for this.

We never have. Not been a reason to or problem arising from it. My DS's school has my DH as second emergency contact before his dad as DH would know where I was if they got as far as calling him.

DH just got PR for DSS when he moved in with us permanently as his xp had always stopped him previously.

I have often wondered about this. My DDs SM is too big for her boots and I keep meaning to find out what exactly her rights are.

What does having PR for education actually mean?

PR gives far too many rights to be signed over to her if you have suspicions. Do you think they would apply for a residence order?

I have never wanted PR and I wouldn't want my dds am to gave it - though I think she's wonderful. In a real, total emergency the emergency services would have to act even if it was a complete random that took her in.
The only time I think it's necessary is if sm acts as mother because of the complete or almost complete absence of bio mother.

Sorry - second line "wouldn't want dd's SM to have it"

I don't have it for mine nor does DP for my DC. In a real emergency a hospital will always treat a child no matter who brings them in (whilst trying to contact a parent). It would allow their step mum to do day to day care a little more easily - eg she could take to GP appointments. Does she do a lot of that? It would also allow her more say in things such as schooling

I don't want PR for my dsd's and their mother would have a heart attack at the idea! If there's no real need for it then I would say no.

wannabe it means that a step-parent can substitute for a parent when dealing with the school - at disciplinaries for instance, and be involved in school selection.

I have told my ex on several occasions that I would be happy for his stbDW to have PR, and he's keen to accept, but my expectation is that he agrees to my DP having the same status - and ex would rather stab red hot needles in his eyes, so it will never happen!
Ex is also under the misapprehension that once he's marries, his DW will automatically have PR - not true!

I had PR for youngest SS when he came to live with us full time. His mum was 2 - 3 hours drive away and they did not talk for about 8-10 months after he said he wanted to live with us.

It basically meant that I could take him to hospital / docs if needed, deal with school and police and social services. DH worked long hours over 90 mins journey away and I worked from home so it made sense for me to be able to deal with things.

However, I was never asked to produce the bit of paper (court order?) and I believe their stepfather had dealt with school/doctors without any proof he had the right to do so (he has never been granted PR).

I suppose you have to look at why you would object to this - it does not mean that the step-parent supplants or takes precedence over DParents - just that if something happened they could step in to help.

Not sure what 'sinister' motive there could be. But maybe that is just me.

Thanks NotaDisneymum.

Personally I wouldnt want this at all. But I can see that in certain circumstances it would be appropriate. DDs SM would let it go to her head. She already tries to override my opinion and authority. The idea of her having legal rights over my daughter makes my blood run cold.

If you are really unhappy about it don't agree to it.

But - have you spoken to them about how you feel she is over stepping her position - maybe SM feels she is helping or providing boundaries for your DD when they are together.

I also know from experience that sometimes what children say happens or has been said is a bit different to what actually happened.

wkdSM. PR does give a person equal status alongside a birth parent. A step-parent with PR could authorise even routine/cosmetic medical treatment or even piercings without needing a birth parents consent, for instance. Easy to imagine a teen stepchild asking their step-parent to be complicit in something they know that their parents won't agree to

If things are amicable and parental commitments mean that they can't always be available for the DCs then there is a place for it, I think - but if there is undue influence and/or conflict, then it's probably best left to the parents.

I do and full custody the same as DH, BM gave us both it when she gave up DSD in Jan, I would never have thought of it or agreed to it without custody as you kinda need it when you have them full time to arrange doctors etc

SMURFY I have taken my DSC to the doctors and for vaccinations etc and I do not have PR for them, so it's not necessary.

TODDLERSRFAB IfIwasarichwoman is correct, resident step-parents have parental "responsibility" of sorts for educational matters. Resident step parents are (as per the education act) entitled to be treated the same as bio parents and others with PR and therefore have a say in all matters regarding education, have a right to attend parents evenings, vote in parents elections, have a right to receive school reports, give consent for trips, sign forms etc. There's more to it but I don't know the full info- you can look it up online though. If your EX's new wife lives with him (one would assume so) then she has this whether or not you want her to, although she may not know it.

I often sign consent forms and do other things school related for my DSC as I am a SAHM and my partner and his Ex both work full time.

Threelittlemonkeys

Do you have your SC fulltime? When DSD got registered at Primary School they wouldnt deal with me as PR hadnt been finalised and until that did and they had the proof only OH could legally sign anything and I was only put down as an emergency contact & not guardian maybe its different in Scotland

monkeys Schools and GPs may be prepared to take the risk - but the legal position is clear; if a school or GP do not have the consent of someone with PR then they are liable should someone with PR challenge them.

My DD recently went on a school residential and the coach company required copies of all the permissions slips in order to fulfil their insurance requirements. The school asked for both my and exH permission.

In my experience, schools tend to be blaze about this until something happens - like a resident step-parent signs a permission slip for an activity that the NRP (with PR) disagrees with - then they realise that they have to tighten up on their procedures.

Exactly NADM
Hence why OH & I told yes told GBM if she wanted to chose her boyfriend pver DSD we HAD to have PR & custody

Your DS does not need a third parent. Just say no.

NOTSODISNEYMUM

It's not a "risk" as such as legally (as per the Education act 1990- something, I believe) school must treat resident step parents as equals to bio parents and anyone else with PR, even if step parent doesn't have PR.

So if something requires "a" parent to sign, I as a resident step parent can quite legitimately do so and the school have to accept it.

Of course with things such as residential trips I assume they require permissions from both parents and anyone else with PR, so a resident step parent solely cannot give permission.

As for the GP, well I guess they would be taking a risk. Although they have a letter on file from my DP giving his permission for me to attend as he has PR he is entitled for me to attend on his behalf as it were.

SMURFY Thats likely because the school admin / receptionist wasn't aware of the rights given to resident step parents by law via the Education act. I'm sure had you known and queried it, they would have had to discuss general things with you.

DSC live 50 % with us and 50% with their mum. I often speak to school about things, I arranged the new uniform order and collection and I also booked the appointment for DSC new class teacher to visit (they visit every child before new term at this school). I went to the last parents evening with DP, I sometimes read with DSC and sign the reading book (DP usually does this though) All no problems. Either they understand how the education act allows me to do this or they are slack. Either way it works great for us as I am a SAHM so stuff like booking appointments during working hours is usually dumped on left to me.

Ooh my crossing out worked. How exciting. (sorry newbie not tried it before) Ahem. As you were. :)

Bonsoir

A resident step parent who has lived with the childen for more than 3 years can apply to court for PR, even if the other parent says no. I'm not sure of all the legal ins and outs but I have heard (online people in step parenting forums only so no real life experience, could all be crap I realise) of it being given where shared residency is in place and the step parent is involved in "parenting" aspects of the children's lives.

In the case described in the OP (shared residency and more than 50% of time with mother) there are no grounds for PR for a third parent.