Here we go again!

[smileyforest]

Please tell me how to deal with this....
Have NP...he has 3 boys...one at home aged 16y. one uni....one away working......I have 4.....also 16yo with me...14yo with his Dad but I have lot of contact...... 2 adult....
Breakdown of second marriage.....hence I have been here before with stepkids and always vowed I didnt want it again!!!
Well things happen.....
Problem is 16yo......(NP)......he rules his Dad....he has been made 'special' as when his Mum was pregnant she lost his twin ...(very early on) he knows this and told me....he is a nice lad.....but bloody hell his Dad is ruled by him...and what he wants ....he has!!!.....His Dad isnt a big earner..(exW left him).....so not easy....I earn OK money...saving for a holiday for both of us and he said he would contribute as well......but nothing so far as he says 'boys come first'.....he also supports lad at uni...(exW does virtully nothing) she has NP...
NP has moved house....he rang and said his son wants master room!!!! He spends most of time up GF....I just thought that was rediculous....is it me ???
We will eventually move in together...not yet....but this son is 'bugging' me OMG please help and tell me how to handle it.....I am open to being critisised...x

Um, run?!?

Seriously, this is a no win for you - your NP is a DisneyDad, and it sounds like he and his ex have spent their whole lives indulging this child because they feel they have to 'make up' in some way for the loss of his twin brother and the guilt of their failed marriage.

It won't change - even when he's an adult - he has been brought up to believe he is entitled to what he wants, and when he discovers that real life isn't like that, his parents are likely to increase their efforts to fulfil his every desire as life is so cruel to him.

Really? If you can get out, then do it!

OMG.....thats extreme.....but get what you mean...I really love my NP.....nearly a year together.....my boys are soooooo different....I've not made any of any of my children 'special'....had horrendous births etc...etc.....and lost one...and told fourth would be disabled....never made them 'special'....all the same to me and each loved equally xxxxxx

I really love my NP.....nearly a year together

You may love him, but how much respect do you have for a man who you say is "ruled" by his 16 year old son? A man who calls his g/f (you) when his son asks for the master bedroom in his new home?

I'm sorry to be blunt, but when the honeymoon period wears off, you will be left in a relationship with a man who you have very little respect for.