Breach of the court order

[Imanonperson]

Well, after threats and minor messing about with the court ordered contact schedule, DH's ex has finally just gone ahead and cancelled our contact with DSS for a weekend. It's so she can go on holiday so no real excuse as she could have gone another time without affecting a contact weekend so DH is applying for an enforcement order. Does anyone have any experience of these or any tips on how much detail the court is interested in? DH will be representing himself.

Feeling secretly and guiltily relieved that we had a restful weekend with no disruptive travel or unpleasant undercurrents of emotion is a whole other tale. Some may flame me for that, others will understand, I'm sure...

No experience or enforcement, has the ex offered to reschedule? I wonder if posting this on legal would help.

I think it's natural to not want to put yourself in a stressful situation so I don't blame you for feeling relieved. I hope it gets resolved and I would be interested in what happens. We have decided not to go back to court to enforce the order..I think a lot of dads feel like this. DH has almost given up on seeing dss regularly but we have to consider the impact of the stress on the rest of the family. Good Luck

I'm not sure when your court order was written but Dhs was before 2010 (i think) and there was no warning in it saying what would happen if either party didn't keep to it. So this meant he just couldn't go to court and get an enforcement - he had to apply to get original court order amended to state the warning. This took weeks.

Then he had to go via mediation (went to CAB) but ex didn't turn up so only then could he get a court date. He self represented which was easy but still had to pay court costs (they vary but i think it was a couple of hundred pounds).

In the end, 6 months later, contact was restored- no remorse from or punishment for the ex's behaviour. We're just waiting for her to do it again at her whim and we'd have to do the whole thing again with no incentive for her not to. Good luck.

How much contact is ordered? Think you might struggle with this one, TBH - I think the court may well consider a holiday a reasonable thing as it is in the child's interest and lots of other factors influence when people can and can't go...or at least that is what our Cafcass officer told us when DSS's mother was doing the same thing.

Are you members of Families Need Fathers? They are very good.

Is it worth making a massive fuss about the children having a holiday? Can't you negociate another weekend instead?

With regards to the court order, the mother HAS to oblige by it, but the father doesnt. I know this doesnt make sense, but court orders are so that fathers get to see their children regularly, the court order orders the mother to make the children available to their father on the agreed times it states. If the father cant see the children on afew occasions when hes suppose to have them then the mother cant do a thing about it. But for the mother, its a different story, she CANNOT refuse access on the agreed times the court order states. I know this as my husband to be in 6 weeks has a court order.

I take it the kids are going on holiday with her then? Do you really begrudge the kids a holiday? Did she offer an alternative weekend?

As expectantmum states a court can not force NRP to turn up for contact but RP can't refuse. My ex just does not bother having DS when he has something better to do and there is nothing I can do about it. I had it specifically written into court order that if I am on annual leave then I have my DS if I wish to go away with him regardless of who is due to have him my view is I care for him 27/8 days a month if not more and I am entitled to spend some fun, quality time with him on holiday as he is with me. I always offer alternative weekends though which he never takes me up on. Sometimes it is not as easy as you think to arrange holidays around contact weekends.

Can you ask her why she has chosen to go on holiday when it is his contact weekend?