like the christmas season...extra special for stepmums, innit?
Last year, DH and I were getting married, away, so that basically took over the summer holiday spot. The kids had fun, and it was still a holiday, but much more about spending time with relatives than it was about doing activities, and frankly it was not in a place with a lot of 'holiday' ambience - it was just my parents' hometown.
This year, I want the DSCs to feel that they are getting a 'proper' holiday. HOWEVER. The reality is that our financial situation is not at all good. We are not well off as it is; we get by, but every month we are dipping into our small savings, just to keep up. I am just finishing my PhD and looking for a job, but we can't move because of the DSC's schooling, and there are few jobs here in my field (yes, I realise I may have to take a job outside my field; I currently work PT, too). We have the two teens and a toddler not yet in nursery. We are due, in September, a massive cut in income (work-related, not unexpected, and we are both looking for more work, but it is all a bit scary at the moment). So while we are determined to still have a holiday, for the DSC's sakes - well, it has to be something that is not extravagant.
In the past, particularly in the years just after their mum's death, the kids had some very nice holidays - the sort of 'once in a lifetime' things most people just don't get at all. DH overspent to give them these, I suppose as a sort of attempt at compensation. Unfortunately, it has given the kids the idea that these are what holidays 'should' be like, and they have very unrealistic expectations. They want to go to exotic or exciting places. They always want to stay in luxury hotels and do expensive activities, buy loads of tat, eat in 'proper' restaurants where they order anything they like, etc... There is a larger and on-going problem, which is that the kids just don't know 'how lucky they are' and have not been given good boundaries (I realise that everyone says that, but it is really, really true in our case and very difficult to address - blame it on the Disney Dad phenomenon, maybe!).
Before we were married, I went on a few weekends away with the kids and DH, and on one holiday to the States with them. After every weekend away, I swore I was never doing it again. And the trip to the States just highlighted all sorts of issues - it was a bit of a disaster. We have come a long way since then, and I don't think it would ever be as bad again. But there are still huge differences in our ideas about a 'good holiday'. I'd rather spend some time in nature - the kids want to spend money or be on their laptops. My family did lots of camping, and I'd really like to do that with my DD, but we tried it once with the DSCs and they hated it. I'm fine with staing in a crappy hotel and just walking around a city, but the kids will hate that. I'm also fine with staying in a cottage in the country somewhere and spending our days out of doors or playing board games together...but the kids will probably hate that, too. The one thing I most don't want is a package holiday at a cheap resort - but then at least there might be activities and other teenagers around. I am willing to concede almost all of my preferences (this time!), and let this holiday be 'for the kids' - but even after I have done that, we still have to keep it within reason financially!
I don't know what I am asking, really - any advice, I suppose, about good things to do with teenagers on the cheap but that won't feel cheap to them!
Anyone else who dreads the holiday thing.....?