how much should dp pay for when money so tight?

[poppadoodle]

dp has teenage kids from previous ,we have young children together money is tight...I am not happy at the prospect of him forking out for cars for them as they come of age especialy as neither them has a part time job to even maintain any such vehicle... I feel resentment at situation would any of you feel the same?

Yes I would. It's never too early to learn that you can't have it if you can't afford it.

With the cost of insurance these days it really isn't viable for kids to have cars. Even if you have a large enough income and can pay all these costs for your kids I don't think it does them any favours as they won't look after a car so well if it's been handed to them on a plate.

They should work, save up and run it themselves. It's hard and it may take years but that's life - if you want something you work for it.

Do they really need them? Even so, it's not really teaching them any life skills if he just gets them one, because he will then feel obliged to pay insurance, tax, up keep.....

We all know what money pits cars are.

Let them save, and then appreciate what they have worked hard for.

It must depend on your upbringing, but I've never understood this whole "Happy Birthday dear! Here's a car!". I am nearing my 30's and still cannot afford a car. Our kids, including step children, wont be having cars handed to them once they hit 17 unless we have a lottery win before then perhaps.

The world's gone mad! Kids seem to think that merely reaching a certain age guarantees them cars, loans, holidays... I have a single Mum friend who really struggles for money who recently spent £400 on her DD's prom dress because "They all had one" they also hired a limo.
Now, It's nice for kids to have these things and which one of us actually wants our child to be the one without?

But it's just ridiculous. No, they shouldn't all have cars for their 17th birthdays. What's wrong with the bus?

I have mixed feelings about this.

Car = freedom and growing up. We also live in a smallish village.

HOWEVER...Its not just the car, its the lessons and the insurance (try £2500 a pop for a young man living in West Mids driving a small citroen). I agree that it is just a step too far. How much are we talking about? £3000?? £4000?? Crazy.

BUT - if a kid shows he/she is willing to have a pop at buying a car (and some scrimp and save) and contributing I would be happier about chipping in. My best mate loaned her DSS £2000 for his car and he is breaking his bollocks to pay for the insurance- lovely lad, hard working, joining the Marines.

If you can't afford it there is NO argument. You can't afford it, end of story. Dont feel guilty.

In any event we dont have to worry about it, here in disneyland exW and DH ferry the DSCs around at the drop of a hat. The thought of getting a job...?!! Getting up at the weekend..?!!

As for getting a bus..exW wont let them ( at 16 15 and 12) as she is neurotic to the point of distraction.

Why would they bother with driving..? Much to much fuss when you have a chauffeur on tap.

I too am anti. DH's ex suggested we buy and insure a car for DS1 for his 18th as "we have the money" (i.e. I have the money!) and "we dont do anything else for him".

In any case even if we did buy him one (if we thought this was a priority) there is no way he could insure it, let alone put petrol in the thing. He has no intention of getting a part time job whilst currently at college even though he has plenty of free time to do so.

I didnt get a car until I was in my thirties, partly because I couldnt afford it but also because I didnt really need one (lived in a city and got public transport). I think as we enter a time where people's approach to transport is altering (eco-car share systems in most cities etc) then getting a car is less and less of a priority.

"Here in Disneyland" teehee, it's great isn't it... look at all the pwetty lights..