MJs post

[MJinSparklyStockings]

Maybe this will end up being deleted too. Im def going to move it to OTBT soon.

But I want to say - without Mumsnet SPs (and others who have helped), DH wouldn't have a wife, DSCs wouldn't have a stepmum, I'd have walked under the pressure.

And in my mind that would be a bad thing.

I love my DSS and DSD with all my heart. When they hurt, I hurt just like I do with my own DCs.

I have 3 of my own DCs as well and I can honestly say SP is so hard - I never imagined in all my years - that simply lovin a child could be so hard and so resented.

I've been through things that would make your toes curl, and so yes - I probably over react to the things DSD says - because I don't think a 15 year old girl should feel the way I felt - it's DV plain and simple - I recognise what she says - because I've felt it too.

Anyway I've had a few too many glasses of wine.

I'll probably regret posting this.

But SP posters - regardless of the hammerings we get - you've helped me loads for such a long time - and at the end of the day - that only helps the DCs, mine, DHs and ours.

A lot of people have disappeared from these boards lately - it's such a shame that a supportive place can't be left to do just that - support those who need it.

Anyway happy Christmas everyone however you are spending it.

And thank you.

MJ

Awwwwww I myst admit that without you and the rest of the SP board I wouldn't still be with DP and that means I wouldnt have DS now I love my DSD and when she sits here crying because she doesn't want to go to her mums it really hurts.

Thankyou all and MERRY CHRISTMAS

i agree , i get so much help from you guys and lvl headed support you have made these last few months very helpful and easier to deal with and i join mj in saying thank you and merry christmas and happy new yr.xx

Nope don't regret it.

Merry Christmas Everyone.

Mj, you and so many others have helped me to get perspective over my situation. I feel quite clear about things at the moment. Dp and I have had one session of counselling and it was clear he has some work to do. Him and ex have also been to mediation and although on the surface it was a waste of time, it has helped him to see more clearly what he has actually fighting against and he has been much more relaxed about things. I don't know if we will be together next xmas but I will try to help dp if he really does want us to be together. If his attitude continues to improve I am hopeful.

Mj I only ever pop in and out, I completely failed as a very young and naive SM and now my 2nd DH is SD to my eldest.

It's hard so hard and those who haven't walked the walk are quick to judge.

Hope to keep seeing you around.

I used to feel so isolated being a SM as unless you know another SM it's hard to understand the challenges. SM support boards are essential as I have received so much advice. I know I am an excellent mum but that doesn't mean being a step parent is easy- it isn't, it's the toughest parenting job in the world.
MJ, your support for people on this board is fantastic..thank-you

Nobody I know in RL has any appreciation of how tough it is being and SP and when I don't know how to cope with the DCs, their mum, my DP's guilt and disneydadness I turn to the SP board on mumsnet. I trawl through the posts and know that there are lots of other SPs out there who are finding it as tough as I am.
MJ - your posts and replies have given me the support/advice/comfort that I've needed. So thank you and merry christmas to MJ and all the mumsnet SPs

Thanks for posting this, MJ. I only joined mumsnet a few months ago, and it has been more help to me than anything else in the last 3 years - in RL. I don't have even one person to talk to in the same situation - my SIL is a stepmum and she is great, but she's also DH's sister and auntie to the stepkids, so I don't say too much to her. All my friends are either still single and childless, or are mum or dad to one small baby - I don't have friends with teenagers, let alone stepkids! Anyway, this board has been fantastic.