Ok, so I shouldn't have looked!

[LaDolcheRyvita]

Twitter isn't private. I looked at my SD's twitterings and it confirmed her feelings about me..... Not good. I've posted here recently about the issues and lord knows, I HAVE tried very hard to like/get on with this young woman for her dad's sake, for our future relationship's sake, and because DH is such a fantastic step dad to my young son.

However, having tried so hard and having had her ignore us since the summer, I now read these hurtful comments and frankly, I just don't want anything more to do with her.

What would you do? Obviously, I cannot say I've looked at her Twitter page. I don't do Twitter or Facebook....far too old! And, I know we all say things we don't mean but..... She's just not a person I want anything to do with, anymore. That makes me sad for everyone's future as I am actually a nice person and am just tired of being spoken down to or ignored. I know I'm the adult but it's SO not good for me!

Greengoose.... It wouldn't be welcomed by her to "let her know she is loved (by me)". Sadly, she'd just laugh at me. First of all, she has the unconditional love of her mum and dad, siblings, wider family. She wouldn't want me to " love " her. She has said as much.

I made an offer of help to her only a few weeks ago, in the absence of her family and she refused me, flat. I simply cannot win.

I'm not going to reproach myself in any way so far. Neither does my DH ....who would NEVER support me, over his own daughter unless it was warranted.

"I think there is a bit of "people in glass houses should not throw stones"

Longjane - wtf? The OP came on here for help. Hardly the same as the DSD just slagging her off on Twitter . Are you able to see the difference? Also I doubt the DSD comes onto mumsnet. For a start there is no mention of her being a parent, or interested in being so. Twitter is for anyone really.

What an awful situation and it says more about HER than you.. I think your role is to be the demon - the focal point to vent all her anger. If you haven't seen her in months what has caused this outburst ? most likely some emotional conflict in her life but she can't deal with it other than to vent at you.It's likely she is a damaged teen and I would hope that her outburst are taken seriously by her parents. She maybe looking to reject you before you reject her but no one can really guess what is happening unless she is willing and encouraged to talk to a counsellor.

Is she likely to improve? I think it all depends on her ability to stop playing the victim and to take responsibility for actions. If she continues to adopt victim status then I guess you will always be the scapecoat. DH's ex has this trait - anything that happens is never a result of her behaviour - even her multiple marriages are DH's fault (if he hadn't left her she wouldn't have married Mr X and then Mr Y).

It is completely natural to feel aggrieved with her and she sounds unpleasant however she is still a child so hopefully she will grow up and improve. If my DD was coming home and slating her SM I would genuinely try to find out why they had issues..I certainly wouldn't encourage inappropriate abuse so I hope her mum is adult enough to help her daughter develop emotional maturity.

I think your dh plays a pivotal role - he needs to be telling his child that rude behaviour isn't acceptable and if she has anger he & she will go to family counselling...he would be naive if he thinks this is really about you..it's about how she is dealing with the breakup. Emotional healthy children don't act up like this...keep that as your mantra