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Step-parenting

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Extremely worried about step son

4 replies

Hippiehappy · 23/08/2011 11:43

Hi.
Sorry for the long story but here we go...
I am so worried about my 'step son'. Me and his dad have separated , my ss and I are still very close an spend alot of time together. He is 13 and has always had lots of issues. His mum has lots of mental health problems. I have always been concerned about my ss under her care. She has always not wanted him to be around, and would get rid of him at any opportunity. Ss's dad and mum split up when he was 7 . We met soon after and have two sons together. Ss's mum re married very quickly, but recently split. Over the last 3 years her mental health has got worse, self harming, suicide attempts and hospital admissions.
She goes out drinking and has lots of lovers. My ss confides in me and tells me all that goes on. We have a very trusting relationship.
Recently things have become more concerning. He tells me that she puts her ex on loud speaker talking about their sexual relationship, she gets her ex to take my ss out for the day, he spends the whole time interrogating him about his mothers other relationships.
He is on holiday with me and my children at the moment, last night he told me that his mum and her ex had a big argument, and he joined in. The ex left then his mum started self harming infront of my ss. My ss had to take the blade away and get rid of it. He is 13, and he talks about this stuff as if it's all so normal.
He also has a perfect circle scab (burn?) on his back, cigarette size. Over the years I have seen this twice before.
He is obsessed with his mum and would go crazy if I told anybody about this. But I know his health and wellbeing come first.
I am so scared for him, I feel like i should do something about this now, but what do I do.
Thanks.

OP posts:
theredhen · 23/08/2011 12:13

It is perfectly normal for him to want to protect his Mother. The abused often want to protect their abusers and take on responsibility for them.

Personally I would speak to social services, anonymously if necessary. Just imagine how you would feel if something really nasty happened/ I don't envy your dilemma. I think your DSS deserves a better life and I think his Mum needs help. I doubt if just leaving the situation as it is going to make either of these things happen.

Hippiehappy · 23/08/2011 12:23

I agree with you completely. Thanks you.
Also I am new to this what die dss stand for?

OP posts:
theredhen · 23/08/2011 12:28

DSS - darling step son. Smile

Good luck. x

Hippiehappy · 23/08/2011 12:29

Ah yes he definately is dss xx thankyou

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