Couldn't his mum just make a bit of effort?

[chelen]

This is really just a rant, my OH & I have given up trying to change anything, we've tried emailing, getting SS to write, him phoning, me phoning - nothing works.

Why oh why oh why does my SS' mum have to be so careless and thoughtless??? The time comes for arranged calls - she doesn't answer. She won't ask his views about what they do on their time even though she is aware he's having a crap time. She is forever working during their contact time. Last year she didn't even get him a proper birthday present.

I love my SS, he's amazing (as much as any kid anyway - obviously his singing is annoying and his jokes are rubbish ;-)) but the stress I feel and the SADNESS I feel because she is just so lame sometimes really gets me down. I want more than anything to be able to support their relationship but what can one say in response to 'I got the answerphone again'!!!

Grrrrrrrr!

Well, I suppose that being able to have children doesnt mean you are able to be a mum does it? Thank goodness he's got you. The stability you offer will hopefully set him on the righ track.
Could you not tell him about scheduled calls and make them yourself then hand the phone over if she answers?

I completely understand your frustration. Her son is just not her priority is it? And it should be! You can't make someone be a decent parent - read some of the stories about useless NRP on the lone parent board.

No suggestions for you but I understand your annoyance.

Hi, thanks for replying - and I think I will suggest we do the calling as BOMgoneoff suggests.

I'm moderately less grumpy after a whole day to reflect!

I can definitely sympathise on this one. 2 years ago, my DF (who has custody) spent a week in hospital after being mugged and having a serious head injury. We weren't together at the time, so the boys automatically went to their mother's. She was trying to get him to have the boys back the first night he was out of hospital when he had very little food in the house and was still trying to get his bearings!!