Would be in AIBU but probably not a good time......

[WkdSM]

So, given the slight furore over the last few day - am I being unreasonable to assume that us SM's can't do right for doing wrong?

For example:

1. Let the DSC's call us Mum / Mummy - we are cold heartless vipers who are trying to steal away affection from their RM (real Mum - is that OK?) and replace her
2. Not agree to being called Mum / Mummy - we are cold heartless vipers who want no real connection with the DSCs and should not have contemplated a relationship with a man who had children

I am seriously thinking of adopting Millwall's chant - Nobody likes us and we don't care.

Seriously - how did becoming a SM turn into a witch hunt? I always thought this was a safe forum to ask for help and express feelings / opinions that we maybe would not want to voice in RL (one of my BF's actually told me not to tell her exactly what my SS had done re child porn as she felt she would never be able to be in the same room as him if she knew the details) - but I could tell you lot and you understood. Everyone needs to be able to vent occasionally.

Perhaps anyone reading this who has not walked in our shoes could show a bit more empathy - is that too much to ask? Or just a bit of restraint. Or even common courtesy.

Or do we not deserve that because we are stepmums?

No we don't deserve it!
We are the scum of the earth!

Seriously though, we cannot do anything right. My DSD calls me mummy sometimes, she likes doing it and last night she gave me a cuddle and said "my lovely mummy" I was nearly in tears I was so proud. But we aren't allowed to feel proud, to love or in anyway take responsibility for our DSC's.

Then at the same time, asking for advice on a SC's behaviour is wrong, as is not liking something they have done or not involving ourselves in their life.
Damned if you do, Damned if you don't!

Sod them, when I pick DSD up later I'm going to give her a massive cuddle and tell her how much I love her, because I do, I really honestly do!

Don't forget we have to have a life like an open book so the RM can know EVERYTHING about us but our DP/DH's are not allowed to know a dam thing about the man that has moved into the old family home and their Child is forced to call him DAD but not allowed to acknowledge our existence as step mum!!

psml at the chant , love it !

My DSD has told me she wants to call me mummy but her RM told her hell would freeze over before she was allowed to call me that. She's 5 and can't understand why she can call her step dad DAD but not me mum. I just told her it was up to her what she called me, I'd be happy either way.

On route mj.... I should be working but brain is mush today lol

I think I've said it before somewhere on here - damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Example:

DP sailed out the door on Sunday, announcing that he was offto buy his DD some clothes. I wasn't asked until he was in the car then came back and said, do you want to come?

Damned if you do: if I say yes and DD gets something in the shops while I am there, it will be binned by HER REAL BIRTH MUM (or whatever we've to use this week), as no daughter of hers will be wearing clothes picked in the presence of a child stealing hard faced whore.

Damned if you don't: if I say no, I am a selfish evil cow who doesn't love DP's DD.

I'm off to look at some song lyrics now

End of rant

ooh you've hit a nerve here. I particularly like the BM's assertion that "you are not a real mother and never have been, therefore you have no idea how to parent and my child is absolutely none of your business!" followed by... child moving out to live with us. Then it was "I dont mind him living with you but you are to have no input or make any decisions about anything to do with him!". Followed by my DH going abroad for two weeks' work, during which time of course I did everything at home inc taking DSS to clubs, cooking dinner, washing, doing fun stuff together then it was "I hear you are trying to act like a parent! You are trying to replace me in his life! Unfortunately I am not dead yet! Stop doing that immediately!!"
How I laughed and laughed....