AARRRGGGHHHH

5 replies

SMummyS · 20/10/2010 17:49

Why is it one good thing is always counteracted with something negative....

We have finally had it confirmed that DSD will be coming to us a night early (ON HER BIRTHDAY) my DP is sooo happy as this is the 1st birthday in 5 years that he's been allowed to see his daughter.. usually only allowed to see her day before or day after!

Anyways gets a call from CSA apparently she's told them he's changed jobs and is earning LOADS of money ha chance would be a fine thing, he's unemployed. Best bit is, she's neglected to tell the CSA she got married (18 months ago), has had another kid (10months ago) and now has PR over her DSS.

Apparently this makes a difference in how much DP has to pay her. She is also been haulled over the coals for lying to CSA saying DP has never paid her, which he has now sent CSA bank statements showing weekly and monthly payments to her, and she will have now received a letter from them detailing this, as we've just received one here.

Although part of me is so lucking forward to DSD's visit this weekend (as I do every weekend) I have this knot in my stomach as I know 'Mummy says...'' will be said alot.

Not really a question as such, just needed to have a rant.

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Sushiqueen · 20/10/2010 17:55

Rant away - most of us have been there.

The amount of times we have heard "mummy says". One of my DSS's is convinced we are absolutely loaded just because his mum says so. This is because I work full-time. The thought that I might have to do so to make sure that we had money to live on after we had paid the maintenance each month is immaterial. Oh and because we have holidays occasionally. They chose to buy the latest gadgets- we go without and have a holiday instead! Not sure how it makes us loaded :)

Ours got caught lying in court about her finances as well.

Enjoy your DSD's birthday. I am sure she will have a lovely time with you.

Original poster

SMummyS · 20/10/2010 18:06

I found a great comment on MN for when DSD says Mummy Says... 'mummy is entitled to her opinion it doesnt always mean its right'

I tend to let the mummy says comments wash over me, until its a very evil one.. we've been having lately.. 'mummy says your not my real dad' grrrr fair enough saying shite like that to an adult is one thing, but messing with a 4year olds brain like that is just evil.

Thanks I cant wait, we didnt see her for 9 months last year due to BM stopping contact and moving house, so missed her birthday, so this one is an extra special one.

As you said its amazing how they 'seem' to know a lot about our lives... hhmmmm we have a saying in our family now.. 'need any more rope' I lost count of the amount of times BM contradicted herself any was discovered lying in court last year/this year..

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ladydeedy · 22/10/2010 09:03

if this is any consolation, my DSS of 10 years has recently said on a number of occasions how he feels bad at believing all the lies his mother told him about me/us when he was younger and now he's old enough to know better (and lives with us too, so really knows how our lives are day to day).

But yes "mum says..." omg, it gets my back up immediately! Now we just put it in perspective by saying it's what's mum's saying "this week" or "today" because sure as anything, it will be contradicted or denied within a couple of days. We can actually have a bit of a laugh about it. But yes, "mum says I should go back and live with her", "mum doesnt want me to go back and live with her", "mum wants me to go over once a week to have tea", "mum says you are a rubbish dad", "mum says you should have nothing to do with me as you are ONLY my stepmother", "mum says you have to look after me as she is going on holiday", "mum says can you come and pick me up from school/party/sports, as she is still in the pub and cant drive".....

ladydeedy · 22/10/2010 09:05

oh and to cap it all : "mum says she thinks you (i.e. me!) earn around x amount of money per year judging by your car, clothes, job title, number of holidays, facials etc you have"

I mean... speechless!

In fact she way under what I actually earn which was even funnier!

jonesy71 · 22/10/2010 09:24

agree the 'mum says' still surprises me. When DSS delivers these comments to me I usually have to spin round to see if there is anyone else to have heard it, partly because I can barely believe my ears and partly because I wish someone could witness it! invariably there's no-one else which is no coincidence as he knows to pick his moments carefully..

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