court

[emjanedel]

I posted a message a few months ago. I was about to meet my partners daughter after being with him for 3 years. Initially her mum was really supportive however after finding out i was pregnant shr withdrew contact - my partner has had no contact with his daughter. He has applied for a defined contact order and has the 1st directions hearing on thursday. Through correspondence with her solicitor she has said she has no problem with him having contact as long as that doesnt include me or our baby daughter. Can anyone who hsa been in this situation tell me what the probabilitiy is of the the judge agreeing with her. I am terried that this bitter angry woman is going to split my family up. Can anyone help?

i dont think the judge will agree with her at all, as long as you have no criminal record and not a threat to the children then there is no real reason why you can't be involved. you partner's solicitor will argue that you are both in a stable secure relationship and that it isnt just a "fling" and you'll be gone tomorrow. As your partner has been having contact and presumably it has only recently stopped, then contact should resume pretty much straight away, although at first it may just be him having contact again for a while. the hearing on Thursday will be adjourned to another date. her solicitor should be telling her that she cannot expect your partner to have contact alone forever! he is bound to move on and that if she doesnt have a real argument (as mentioned above) then the judge will not listen to her.

The court will not side with her on that one, if anything it will make her look petty. My DSD's mum had no issue with me being around her until me and her dad got serious and I moved in with him and his dad. She stopped contact. When it started again, the judge got annoyed with her lame attempts to hold things up. One of them was she wanted to 'inspect' our home (as we had moved from his dads) to check it weas up to standard. The judge basically told her that it was an unreasonable request and to stop dragging the proceedings out. However I am still not allowed to be on my own with her, DP has to be there for teh entirity of the contact - soon to be altered as its getting where I go shopping on a sat and DSD wants to come but unless dad comes too she cant.. que screaming fit!!

HI
Thanks for advice sorry for taking so long in replying. We went to court - she decided her best form of defence was that i have a drink problem and am unsafe to be around children.
Her solicitor started off explaining to us that her professional eyes my partner and i wanting any level of contact together would never happen.
He then went into a meeting with a cafcass officer who explained what her allegation was. He then explanied that we had a four month old daughter and i obviously wasn't a threat to her (i am a tea-total, don't drink as it gives me terrible rashes and headaches.) The Cafcass officer recommended that i provide the court with evidence of my intolerancen - which thankfully can be done.

I am at my wits end - if she can stoop to telling bear faced lies - what the hell are we up against.

Back in court in two weeks.

emjanedel you'd be amazed what shit can be brought up against you in court as a stepmum.. When we were going through the court proceedings cafcass were going to be involved so biomum drilled it into DSD's head that I restrained her.. when asking DSD what does that mean her response was 'i dont know mummy told me thats what happened' Our solicitor was very nice and very good at her job. She told me not to worry as the truth will always out. 9 months on after court and she still throws accusations my way.. I just cant win. My point is the court sees this day in day out so they know that iff the dad is taking the mum to court the mum with no doubt stoop low, so they have usually rise above all that, or thats what our solicitor said