Grassroots football - 8 year old

[lauribec]

DS started attending an U8 football club before Christmas 2025, trial period has passed and I’m assuming he’s officially part of the team - I’ve set up a monthly direct debit with them.

My boy has enjoyed going to the training, seems to get on well with the boys which has been lovely. He has a lot of issues at school so this has felt like a breath of fresh air!

My OH messaged the coach to see if DS is able to take part in games yet as he’s super excited! Coach has replied to say a player that left has come back to join the team and so there’s no space on the team for my boy. He says he likes to give the boys as much playing time as possible (my boy getting zero time) but he wants DS to continue coming to training as he feels he’s making progress.

So we’re paying the same amount per month as all the other families but my son is missing out on 4 matches per month. I thought the whole point in grassroots was to be inclusive of everyone! Kids being subbed on an off is the norm isn’t it? To give them all a go! I feel so sad for him, I haven’t actually told him yet as he keeps asking me to ask the coach when he can play a match!

This seems so wrong to me?! They’re 7 and 8 years old! The boy that’s decided to come back has obviously taken priority over my son. I can only assume because he’s a more skilled player 😅 coaches own son is also part of this team.

That's terrible! Do you live near any other teams? I've coached that age group and we were meticulous in making sure everyone that wanted to play got equal time at matches, it's the best way to learn how to play. Some people men can get stupidly competitive though, although by U16 most of our teams were winners so maybe there was something in equality at a younger level after all.

Annoyingly our local team don’t take on players until year 5 😫 I’m so torn as he’s really happy there, he’s cried on the way home over kids teasing him in school and I just worry I could move him to another team where he doesn’t gel as well with them if that makes any sense?

This is exactly what I would expect, I know I’m no coach but I would never dream of excluding one child! They aren’t exactly a huge team either, maybe 10 kids max! So subbing wouldn’t exactly be the end of the world.

Ahh that’s great! Gave them some good foundations 😊 I fully agree, they need to have game time to learn! Think I might have a look around and see if anything else is available.

In this situation I'd find another team that's a better fit for your ds, this won't be good for his confidence.

But...

Training only basis is sometimes used for developing weaker/new players or where squads are too big and not everyone makes the main team. Unusual at U8 as most would just find another team if match time is important to them.

Don't assume grassroots is inclusive, it really depends on the ethos of the coach and the club. Some can be very nurturing, equal game time, about commitment etc but others are competitive, all about winning and producing good players. The attitude will vary team to team and it can take trying few teams to find the right one for you.