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How to get your kids to brush without the battle: Ask a dental expert

123 replies

MaddyMumsnet · 03/06/2025 08:58

Beat the challenge of getting your kids to brush their teeth.
Ask our dental expert about good oral health habits and what you can do to help your kids enjoy keeping their teeth healthy and at the same time reduce your stress! Are you struggling to get your child to brush their teeth? Worried about cavities and visits to the dentist? Too many sugary treats? Perhaps your child has physical or sensory challenges which make it difficult to brush? Our dental health expert is here to answer your burning questions and help you find long lasting routines that fit seamlessly into your family life.

About the expert
James Goolnik BDS MSc, a dentist with a passion for nutrition. James is the Founder of the Optimal Dental Health in London and a member of The International Academy of Oral Medicine and Toxicology, and fully SMART certified. James was previously President of the British Academy of Cosmetic Dentists and is now head judge of the Private Dentistry Awards and lectures internationally on the mouth body connection. James has twice been voted the most influential person in dentistry in the UK. He is currently studying for a diploma in functional nutrition with The Institute of Optimal Nutritionists and his mission is to help the UK get healthier starting with their mouths! James is married with three children.

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How to get your kids to brush without the battle: Ask a dental expert
DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 13:58

Dizzywizz · 06/06/2025 06:15

Our dentist says to spend 3 minutes brushing, including one minute on your tongue! This seems excessive, is it really needed?!

Hi @Dizzywizz 3 minutes is likley to cause damage to the teeth or gums and cause more irritation and inflammation. 2 minutes is enough for your child. If you are concsious about the bacterial load on the tongue, we would suggest a child's tongue scraper. You can even use a metal spoon to start off with! For children one scrape is all that is needed, should take five seconds!

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 13:58

pushchairprincess · 06/06/2025 09:28

I spent a lot of time to help my children learn to clean their teeth, telling them what I was doing from a very early age, ''brush your smilies'' brush your crunchies'' a different technique for from and back teeth, starting with a milk teeth toothpaste and then a junior toothpaste, they are now at senior school both with beautifully white teeth and no fillings have ever been needed.

Hi @pushchairprincess Congratulations, that's good to hear!

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 13:59

MumC2141 · 06/06/2025 18:55

My child uses a strawberry flavoured child’s toothpaste as they don’t tolerate mint flavours, which most toothpaste seems to be. It says it is for age 3-8, but seems to have the same amount of fluoride as adult toothpastes. So is there another reason it says it is for this age group or can they continue using this into adulthood if needed? I’ve looked for non mint flavoured toothpaste for older children and adults and can only find a few very expensive brands.

Hi @MumC2141 All depends on diet, if your child has no sugar and no history of decay then flouride free or Hydroxpatiate containing toothpaste will work well (just speak to your dentist).You could try OraNurse Kids fluoride-free toothpaste, which is flavourless. If they have sugar or previous cavities and under aged 6 then a toothpaste containing up to 1000 ppm Fluoride. Over 6 can have an adult toothpaste up to 1450ppm Fluoride.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 13:59

Breathing123 · 06/06/2025 19:07

What about mouth breathing? Would love to hear more on here about this topic!

Hi @Breathing123 Hi Breathing123, Mouth breathing can lead to dry mouth, bad breath, and even affect sleep quality. It may cause dental issues like cavities or gum disease because saliva, which protects teeth, is reduced. It’s often linked to allergies, nasal blockages, or habits. Breathing through the nose is healthier as it filters air and supports better oxygen uptake. If mouth breathing is frequent, it’s worth checking with a Myofunctional therapist to address the cause. I always start with addressing this during the day before working on it when your child sleeps.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:00

Sleepybumble · 07/06/2025 11:10

DD has some plaque on her teeth she was upset when the dentist tried to remove it as she didn't like the sensation. After that the dentist didn't try very hard to remove it, she said she didn't want to put DD off going to the dentist. I worry about it all the time. Will she end up with dental caries under this plaque?

Hi @Sleepybumble Ideally you want to remove this plaque daily. Perhaps find a dentist that can take a gentle and staged approach. Many children suffer from dental anxiety, so it's best to build a relationship with a dentist that can offer small steps first. Some dental practices also offer nitrous oxide treatment to help keep your child calm and relaxed in the chair.

Encourage your child to drink plenty of water throughout the day, especially after meals and snacks to wash away food particles and increase saliva flow. Offering crunchy, fibrous foods like raw carrots, apples, celery, and cucumber can help stimulate saliva flow while also gently scrubbing the teeth. You could try floss picks which are easy and gentle on the mouth.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:01

SnappyPeachSeal · 08/06/2025 15:56

My almost 2 year old clamps her mouth shut or throws the toothbrush away when I try to brush her teeth. I’ve tried all sorts of brushes and tricks and tips but she really hates it - how can I brush her teeth without force?

Hi @SnappyPeachSeal Try to make it playful, even when it's not time to actually brush the teeth. Model brushing your own teeth with enthusiasm, brush a toy’s teeth together, or let her brush yours to build comfort and curiosity.
Offering simple choices, like which brush to use or where to brush, can give her a sense of control. Try brushing in front of a mirror, use songs, and keep the routine brief and fun. Keep sugary snacks and juice to a minimum, offer water after meals, and focus on celebrating small wins. Try and take them to the dentist so they can check everything is developing as it should.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:01

DanBenandBud · 09/06/2025 14:29

What improvement would you expect to see in children's teeth if plant based sweeteners were used in place of current sugars in most foodstuffs ?

Hi @DanBenandBud Ideally your child should be eating real food with no sweeteners. If plant-based sweeteners such as xylitol replaced regular sugars in most foods, you would likely see a significant reduction in tooth decay among children. Unlike sugar, these sweeteners don’t feed the harmful bacteria that cause cavities, so plaque buildup and acid attacks on enamel would decrease.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:02

Britanniaa · 09/06/2025 16:51

Hello, when is the best age to start teeth brushing - as soon as they get milk teeth ? and if this is around 6-8 months what's the best way to do this please ?

Hi @Britanniaa Yes, the best time to start brushing is as soon as your baby gets their first tooth, usually around 6–8 months. Use a soft baby toothbrush with just a smear (grain-of-rice size) of toothpaste.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:03

namenomnombre · 09/06/2025 19:55

Should children floss and if so what's the vest way to teach this?

Hi @namenomnombre Yes, children should floss, especially once any two teeth are touching, which often starts around age 2 to 3. Even baby teeth can get cavities between them, and brushing alone doesn't remove plaque from those tight spaces. Make flossing fun and playful and try using handheld floss picks for easier handling.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:03

Sprookjesbos · 09/06/2025 21:42

Hello, my 7 year olds front tooth came in with a white/ yellow mark on it. It was there immediately when it emerged so I don't think it can be decay. He did have an accident two weeks before the tooth came through where he fell and bashed the gums on some play equipment. I remember thinking thank goodness the teeth weren't in or he'd have knocked them out!! Could this have marked the tooth and is it worth seeing a dentist?

Hi @Sprookjesbos Thanks for your question Sprookjesbos. The mark on your child's new tooth could be from the injury, it might have affected the developing tooth beneath the gums. Since it appeared right when the tooth came in, it’s likely not decay. It’s a good idea to see a dentist though, just to check and make sure everything is okay and to get advice on care moving forward.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 04/07/2025 14:03

mikado1 · 10/06/2025 09:02

When Is the best time to brush? I've heard you shouldn't brush within a half hour of eating. It is better to brush before eating in the morning as we don't have a half hour to wait afterwards?

Hi @mikado1 Brushing right after eating, especially if the meal or drink was acidic (like fruit, juice or yoghurt), can actually do more harm than good. After an acidic meal, the enamel temporarily softens, and brushing too soon can wear it away over time. I recommend waiting at least 30 minutes before you brush after eating, to give saliva time to neutralise the acids and re-harden the enamel surface. If you do need to brush straight away have a 10 second rinse with water first.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:40

Montydoo · 10/06/2025 09:36

Are sugar free juices any good - in terms of the artificial sweeteners - I am offering the Robinsons juices but not sure about the dental implications - they brush morning and evening

Hi @Montydoo sugar-free juice, like Robinsons is better than sugary juice, but it’s not completely tooth-friendly due to its acidity and encourages your child to crave sweet drinks. It’s best as an occasional drink with meals, not as an all-day beverage. Prioritise water as the main drink, you can add mint or cucumber to change the flavour.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:42

ThatTipsySnail · 10/06/2025 09:43

Any suggestions for fun ways for my children to clean their teeth?

Hi @ThatTipsySnail There are plenty of clever ways to encourage this. I suggest putting on a timer (there are some brushing timer apps available that can help you) or playing their favourite 2 minute song whilst brushing along. There are many kids charities online that also have fun resources to help such as The Magic Dentist. Try brushing together as a family.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:44

Holidazzzz · 10/06/2025 09:49

We are taking our 7 year old on a long haul flight in August. She won't clean her teeth most days and is a bit anxious about the flight. Last time she got bunged up ears and she remembers it being painful. I was going to suggest she chews some gum but that's not great for a kid - what can you suggest?

Hi @Holidazzzz Try and make brushing fun, do it together with her. Finding fun and playful ways incorporate the importance of brushing can help. At playtime, suggest helping one of her toys brush their teeth, or get them to show you how to brush YOUR teeth in a kind and caring way and make sure to tell them how important it is that your teeth are clean. Let her choose the flavour of her toothpaste, Xylitol gum such as Peppersmith gum is a great way to help keep kids teeth clean in between brushing, increasing saliva flow and unblock the ears on flights.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:44

EmMummyUK · 10/06/2025 10:35

I have read about xylitol on here. Is it OK for pregnant women to chew gums made from xylitol?

Hi @EmMummyUK Yes, xylitol gum is generally considered safe for pregnant women when used in normal amounts. Xylitol is a natural sweetener that doesn’t raise blood sugar levels and can actually help reduce harmful oral bacteria, which is beneficial since pregnancy can increase the risk of gum problems.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:45

AdeptPeachBeaker · 10/06/2025 16:00

My gums are in poor health - bleeding and look like they are shrinking, what can I do about that?

Hi @AdeptPeachBeaker Gums shrink if they are inflamed or you are overbrushing. The first thing I would recommend is to book in with a dental hygienist who can assess your overall mouth health. You may have gum disease due to the regular bleeding gums or it may be a sign of a further underlying issues. Your hygienist will be able to set up a plan to help improve gum issues.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:47

Dashel · 12/06/2025 08:41

In an ideal world, should we be worried about unnecessary chemicals, sweeteners, colourings etc in children’s and adults toothpaste?

Are there any brands you could recommend that would also not be tested on animals and vegan please?

Hi @Dashel Ideally if you are not eating sugar, processed foods or refinded carbohyradates you do need to use toothpaste not just brush with water. There are lots of more natural brands such as Gutology Kids toothpaste. This toothpaste is enriched with natural hydroxyapatite to strengthen and protect growing teeth. It also includes probiotics to support the oral microbiome. The product is vegan, cruelty-free, and free from fluoride.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:48

RebeccaMH · 13/06/2025 08:26

Hi James! My kid is going through the stage of having a complete meltdowns before bed and point blank refusing to brush her teeth. I've contemplated those chewy tooth brushes that you get in the machines at service station, but they can be hard on the gums. How can I make things fun, just for the evenings? Her teeth are in great condition. Mornings are fine - perhaps because she's already sleepy! Thank you.

Hi @RebeccaMH Firstly well done on having a good morning brushing routine, keep evenings light and pressure-free. To make evenings fun, try brushing together as a game or sing a favorite song while brushing. Let her pick a fun toothbrush just for bedtime. Maybe use a timer or a brushing app with animations to keep it playful. You could try bringing the evening brushing forward to just 30 minutes after dinner so less sleepy?

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:49

JohnnyBlake · 13/06/2025 09:52

When it comes to brushing my 3-year old daughters teeth, there's resistance to the activity (this is an understatement to put it lightly). I'm concerned given the resistance that we're not doing a good enough job brushing her teeth. What can we do to make the process easier and ensure that we're getting rid the plaque and bacteria?

Hi @JohnnyBlake Try and make it fun and use a colourful, kid-friendly toothbrush she likes. Let her hold the brush sometimes to feel in control. Make it a game, like “brush the sugar bugs away” or sing a short brushing song. Use a small brush and focus on just 1–2 minutes. If she resists, try brushing her teeth first, then let her have a turn. You could try using disclosing tablets that stain all the plaque, kids love the purple tongue and trying to brush the bugs away. Consistency and patience are key!

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:50

Gorondola · 13/06/2025 20:05

When my children had their very first dentist visit, the dentist recommended I start them on a mild mint toothpaste and not a flavoured one. Why is this important?

Hi @Gorondola it's important to find a toothpaste your child likes and ideally not sweet tasting toothpastes. Most adult toothpastes are based around mint, so getting them used to mint flavours can be beneficial. Mild is a great place to start such as spearmint.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:52

stample · 13/06/2025 20:28

Should Children just use toothpaste? They brush twice a day and do mouth wash once a day, but do they need to floss also? And is plaque removal at home safe for them with home dental tools?

Hi @stample I would recommend flossing as soon as your children have teeth that touch (just once per day). Brushing twice a day is ideal but if you need to start off with smaller steps, then once a day will set them up for good oral health habits. I would recommend seeing a hygienist who can recommend the best course of action for removing plaque and preventing further build up. Dental tools should only be used by dental professionals!

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:53

RhubarbRocks · 14/06/2025 08:48

My baby is 15 weeks old and I can see his bottom two teeth through his gums although they are not through yet. Lots of dribbling and chewing going on! Do I need to do anything to keep his gums clean, when do I start brushing and when should he first visit the dentist? Thank you!

Hi @RhubarbRocks You can wait until these two teeth are fully through and no need to brush the gums at this stage. Can use teething tools if they are in pain. I would bring your child in to see the dentist, where they can provide a full assessment of their oral health.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:53

Untery · 15/06/2025 10:23

Do you recommend extraction of first permanent molars with severe hypomineralisation? Or is it possible to keep and restore? Also will having these teeth missing affect their dental health in any other way? Poor bite etc?

Hi @Untery You can wait until these two teeth are fully through and no need to brush the gums at this stage. Can use teething tools if they are in pain. I would bring your child in to see the dentist, where they can provide a full assessment of their oral health.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:54

Hi @Untery apologies - here is the answer to your question:
We always try and keep adult molars if possible, important for long-term bite development and spacing. Extraction of first permanent molars with severe hypomineralisation is the last resort. But only after very careful assessment. Treatments to keep the tooth may include composite fillings or sealants, depending on how much structure remains. I would recommend seeing a specialist paediatric dentist who can help provide further support for your daughter.

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DrJamesGoolnik · 11/07/2025 12:55

Boxhoarder · 15/06/2025 10:49

My 10 year old daughter still sucks her thumb and she has buck teeth as a result. I've tried to get her to stop - special nail polish, thumbsies, plasters, fidget toys but nothing works. My dentist told me I should do everything I could to get her to stop but I've tried and nothing works. Do you have any suggestions please?

Hi @Boxhoarder Since physical tools haven’t worked, the key may be addressing the emotional side of the habit. Gently involve her in the process by explaining how it affects her teeth and inviting her to help create a plan to stop, using positive goals and small rewards. Understanding when she sucks her thumb, is it during stress, boredom, or sleep? It may be a good idea to offer soothing alternatives, such as calming bedtime routines, soft comfort items, or stress-reducing activities. Some children work well with sticker charts and a reward. If it’s deeply ingrained, an orthodontist experienced in habit-breaking can also support her with tailored, kind strategies.

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