What are your top tips for maintaining a healthy balance when it comes to technology use in your family? Share with BT

[EllieMumsnet]

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With technology making up a big part of many peoples’ lives, including childrens’, there is a lot of conversation around how to ensure technology doesn’t completely take over family life. Technology can be a great source of education, entertainment, downtime and for some an essential part of work. BT and Internet Matters have teamed up to create their own list of tips for making sure your family has a healthy balance with technology, please click here to read them, but they would also really love to know your top tips.

Here’s what Bruce Cuthbert, Director of BT Devices has to say: “There are so many benefits for our children online, and an equal number of distractions. With kids back in school and autumn upon us, we’re spending more time indoors and the temptation is for kids to spend more time online. With Whole Home Wi-Fi, parents can pause the wi-fi and schedule wi-fi access device by device, to help children focus during study time and make bedtimes that bit easier, finding the right balance of online and offline time for the whole family. To find out more about Whole Home Wi-Fi, please click here.”

Do you have a time when you’ve agreed that you and your family will be off your devices, such as by dinner time? Perhaps you ensure that you have family days out and don’t take any technology with you? Maybe you go old-school and play board games on an evening with the family instead of watching tv? What if you were able to group your kids devices and then pause their wi-fi access at certain times; would this be useful to you?

Whatever your top tips are for maintaining a healthy balance when it comes to technology use in your family, post them on the thread below and everyone who does will be entered into a prize draw where one winner will win a £300 voucher of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw!
MNHQ

Standard Insight T&Cs Apply

Mobile phones are kept in a locked drawer at night. I also have banned phones from the dinner table during the week. This is so we can talk and improve our conversation skills etc. At church I insist on putting all phones on silence.
Instead of technology in bedrooms I have books and toys.

We don't have tablets and computers for the children just yet. Many of their friends do but I don't see a need, if they have one they'll use it. They don't so they don't. At 6 and 4 they're young enough to go with the flow. When we inevitably need to get them computers it'll be limited and controlled well, I am pretty capable and will ensure it's secure and safe use only. As they get older, well part of letting them grow up is letting them have more control over their lives and this will be a part of that. If I'm too strict they'll only want it more, but I'll still need to protect them to a certain extent....I hope to show them that it isn't something that needs to be too relied upon and is a tool to assist with life rather than a way of life. I aim to teach them a little basic coding and show them how things work so they understand their tech rather than just using it.
For now the best way to instil good behaviours is to keep our usage down as much as possible though lately I've been so busy and my phone facilitates me getting so much done it's hard to model technology free behaviour!

I recently tested the Amazon fire kids 8" and then parental controls on that are great as you can set time limits for use and time spent on educational apps before games allowed

We don't take tech out and we don't use it when we have visitors, doesn't matter who the visitor is it's just manners not to be sitting on a screen and will hopefully help when they are old enough to have their own phone

No tech weekday mornings, homework has to be done before tech and it has to be off an hour before bed

Also by setting a good example with my own tech use, I try to limit it as much as possible when DC are around

I think we are quite lucky but so far we've not had any real battles. The boys are very active and have football twice a week after school, cycling club and jujitsu and so when they get back they are happy to eat , watch a bit of TV and crash. I have noticed that it's harder in holidays but the key is keeping them busy with other things. We never use technology at the dinner table and it's not allowed in bedrooms. I don't set specific limits but they know that if they do not put their iPads down when I ask they lose them for 2 days. I'm sure it may get worse as they get older.

We've always had a fairly laissez-faire approach to technology, while our boys were growing up we allowed them to self-regulate with their phones, consoles, computer games (although we do insist that computers and consoles are downstairs, not in bedrooms), but made sure there were always plenty of books, games, musical instruments, outdoor activities on offer as well, and it worked very well until they hit about 14. At this age they seemed to become much more immersed in the world of social media, online gaming, YouTube etc and it's now, in their mid to late teens that we're finding we need to put more structure in place. We have a few ground rules now - no phones at night, certain communal experiences (meals together, movie nights, family games) where we do say "no devices now, please". We don't censor what they watch and do, but we do talk to them and try to keep the channels of communication open and honest, so that they can come to us if anything is troubling them.

There is no technology before school in our house and they don’t use devises like iPads at home as there aren’t any games on there.
Tv is generally an after school thing and how much depends on how exhausted they are. In the summer they watch very little.

No screens at mealtime in our house. No iPad on school days only tv. Weekends they get their iPads and tablets 1 hour each. The routine is consistent, they don't bargain for more.

Eldest is 10 so I feel we’re just on the brink of this becoming more and more of an issue. We have no phones at the table for meals, trying no devices in bed but struggle with that one, and most recently have started ‘screen free sunday’ (including telly though it ok if we’re sitting down as a family to watch something together). That’s a real challenge but the couple we’ve done so far have been worthwhile and means we are more likely to get out for a walk or get a board game out. dH & I but mainly DH have found it the hardest and it was my dd who reminded me of it last Sunday. I think they like that we are off our phones.

No phones and consoles at the dinner table EVER, the wifi is programmed carefully to go off at 8.30 pm and come on after school, so there is no temptation. As I am the only one who knows the settings on the WIFI they cannot be changed. Whilst I like having the internet in my home, it's so important to have limits on it.

My son was engaged at school and doing well, until we allowed him to have a PC in his room. Then he went into his room and emerged 2 years later, having been totally turned off from school. His results were far lower than expected, and he couldn't be bothered to finish 6th year. He's back on track now (aged 23), thank goodness, but I thought I would just mention how not to do it.

And I don't think there is much point in laying down rules for your kids, if the adults are always glued to their screens.

A Chinese boy (aged 20) told me recently that at the Spring festival, families used to gather and people used to talk to each other. Now, he says, the young and very old people still want to talk, but the 'elders' (aged 30 - 50, I think) are all on their phones all the time.

Our DC are both still relatively young (3 & 6) so it's a bit easier to deal with. They're both getting a Kids Kindle for Christmas and I think the main thing will be getting them used to having screen time limits right from the start. Also we tend to offer a choice between TV time or tablet time, they can do one but not both. The tablets won't be allowed in bedrooms or after a certain time in the evening.

Similar to a pp, there's no TV allowed in the morning until everything is ready for school and I try to avoid putting it on until after dinner in the evenings. And definitely no screens (for any of us!) at the table.

being strict from the start and consistency.i don't mean we never allow them to go on it but its always been a thing that we would try and do other things first for as much as we can and as long as we can.
it would never be a given that screens were a free for all.
so its not been a major issue with having to create too many inforced rules.punishments or pushing to get them away from them.
I also think it has to do with relationships in the family and home life and even mental health or emotional health on why kids sometimes use the screen or don't just want to be with their family.
no screens at the meal time.ever.
tv will be turned off sometimes for homework.or will be turned off during if they are not concentrating.
in the morning the phones are put down until they are ready.
generally though again because we never been reliant on them they haven't been so bad.
Do you have a time when you’ve agreed that you and your family will be off your devices, such as by dinner time?yes to phones.but we like the tv on at meal times.
Perhaps you ensure that you have family days out and don’t take any technology with you?yes to family days out and trying to be there for eachother and do things outside or just be doing stuff together so they don't think they need to be living through a device.but they are allowed to birn gthere phones with them.
Maybe you go old-school and play board games on an evening with the family instead of watching tv?its ok to do both.and at the same time.we love the tv.and it brings us together too.watching togheter and playing or eating with thtv their.
What if you were able to group your kids devices and then pause their wi-fi access at certain times; would this be useful to you?it depends if this was having to be inforced because they weren't able to come off it I would be more concerned that its gotten to this point and it never has.but if its just a given that will and has always been off at certain time in the family and its not a problem and just how we work then yes it could be a good idea.but again id want it just to be how we work and not have to be put then in place for them to get agro over because it being a punishment.im thinking more at night time this could be useful.as much as yo try to be comfortable and open and think things will be ok because your trying your best to be there for your kids.things happen.and I do think kidas are more vunerable with their devices nowadays so having them shut off at night would be a good idea I think.
if we see it coming out too much then we will tell them to turn them off.

We set a limit on tablets and phones etc and nobody uses them at the dinner table. Its good to have times away from technology and have family time to talk to each other. Conversation time should be made important.

I have a range of children from 6 months to 13 years. We have the following rules:
No phones at meal times
Phones / devices have to be left in the utility room to charge from 9pm at night and are not allowed in bedrooms over night
We don't have TVs in bedrooms
My children know the consequences if they do not follow the rules - I have no issues with banning them from them if they misbehave
We also occasionally have device free days too

My son has his own tablet with parental controls set, and we have put educational apps on for him to use. He does love to watch those annoying videos on YouTube of Blippi and Ryan's Toys though
We are aware of how much time he is on it and limit it to a couple hours a day, which is spread out throughout the day.
As he is still young, he does turn it off when asked, and it stays in the lounge.

No gaming/phones from dinner time onwards. Except at weekends!

For every km walked or run is 30 minutes screen time. Hopefully give my daughter good grounding of leisure & exercise

We aren’t overly strict but no screens in bedrooms and no screen time after evening meal, just quiet games, reading, talking and winding down for bed.

Everything in moderation. Don't over think it....it's hard enough as it is!!!

I have set my internet settings with filters, (I'm with BT) and 'down time' the settings show me which device has been connected, and I have bespoke the settings for times (9 pm for the older ones and 7 pm for the younger ones and to come on after school - weekends are different). I am happy I have blocked a lot of content, and feel in control of their internet time. I am conscious around the time my DS spends on his gaming console, so we have an array of board games which we will play after team, partly to distract them off their devices, but for family time. But I have to say gaming consoles are a god send when we are in the car to help the journey pass for them.

My children are young so it is easy now, I get to decide when and for how long, they don’t have free access.

I try to model behavious as well, limiting my screen time when we’re all together. e.g. if we’re at the park Ionly use my phone to check the time or get information we need to do something/go somewhere next.

We don’t have any screens during meal times, though I will play music.

I also limit their use to educational apps, usually something by the BBC or apps the school want them to use for maths and reading.

No screens during meal times is a must.
It's often the only time we all sit down together so take the opportunity to actually talk to each other!
Limited TV- usually around 20 mins each evening to wind down before we start bedtime routines. We obviously have days were we watch more but still try to keep it minimal.
We don't have any tablets and the DC don't know how to access laptops/ TV / phones on their own. I know this won't last though so I think it'll just be about restricting the time spent on such devices.

I don't have smartphone so my phone is only for calls and texts but no phones are allowed at the table regardless of what sort they are.

Mealtimes are definitely for talking not screens.

I think being able to pause wi-fi on kids dives would be a great idea but there are so many things they can still do o them without the internet.

We still love board games and try to play them when we can - so much better than stupid computer games!