Share your embarrassing stories with Flora and you could win a £200 John Lewis voucher NOW CLOSED

[KatieBMumsnet]

Flora have asked us to find out about Mumsnetters' most embarrassing moments.

Here's what Flora have to say: "We know that family life doesn't always go right but one of the best things we can do is have a giggle about it. So share your family funny moments and you could win a £200 John Lewis voucher!"

Please take a look at their new video and let us know if anything similar has ever happened to you . Or...

Have you ever made a silly mistake that your family enjoys teasing or reminding you about? Or perhaps youve been embarrassed by something your DCs have done?

Whatever your embarrassing anecdote is, Flora would love to hear about it.

Everyone who adds their comments on this thread will be entered into a prize draw where one MNer can win a £200 John Lewis voucher.

Please note your comments may be included on Flora's social media channels, and possibly elsewhere, so please only post if you're comfortable with this.

We're also looking for folks to be part of the Flora panel to take part in various activities over the coming months. For more info and to sign up head over to the thread here.

Thanks and good luck with the prize draw,

MNHQ

[JaneTennison]

My daughter came in to say goodnight to me in bed (teen kids, so up late).

It was a very hot night, and I was naked, but under a sheet. She tickled me, I wriggled away desperate to escape, twisted badly, dislocated my kneecap and it stuck jammed out, and very sore. We had to call an ambulance and, while I was able to dress the top half the bottom half was beyond movement at this point. Oh the shame.

[SarahAndFuck]

There are too many. Most recently, explaining to four year old DS that it's not just cows that make milk. Lots of things make milk.

Me: "Even people can make milk sometimes. I made milk for you when you were a baby."

DS face: "And did it come out of your bum? Did it Mum? Did I drink milk out of your bum when I was a baby?"

This would have been much less embarrassing if we hadn't been sitting in a busy restaurant at the time and he hadn't decided to ask at full volume.

It was worse than the time he invited a total stranger in the supermarket to have a look at my bra (was buying new underwear at the time, bra was in the trolley) and the many times in car parks when he has shouted gleefully "Dad can drive in the front and you can sit in his backside Mum, with me! We like sitting in Dad's backside don't we? Lucky Dad's backside is so big isn't it Mum?"

Or possibly the time my mother was reading him a story, on a packed bus, and the man in the picture had a beard (like my Dad). My mother, obviously thinking of my Dad, said to DS "and who do we know who has a beard like that?"

DS's reply: "You Grandma! You do, I can see it on your chin when the sun shines on it! Look!"

[Switz]

So many to choose from but here are a couple:
Age about 11 on a family dinner to the local Harvester (our family like to live the dream) my sister and I went to the loos together. I finished before her so decided to hide around the corner and jump out at her as she came past. Needless to say it wasn’t my sister who got shrieked at in the face with accompanying aggressive hand waving but an octogenarian who had to sit on a chair to recover whilst her family and staff crowded around saying ‘What happened? Who did it?’ I can’t look a salad cart in the face any more.

Not me but my Aunt. On holiday in Wales we are on a remote but quite exposed beach about a half hour walk from the car park. Aunt decides she really needs a wee but can’t wait half an hour to go back to the car park where there is a café. My Mum tells her to just go in the sea to which she looks horrified but she perseveres saying everyone does it, no one will know etc. So Aunt walks into the sea but only up to her ankles, pulls down her bikini bottoms, moons the whole beach and has her wee. I honestly don’t know to this day why she didn’t go further in to the sea!

[serin]

We had the whole medical establishment puzzled for a while as both toddler DS's developed orange faces, hands and bottoms.

They were actually referred to a specialist before we discovered the cause of the problem. DH was using my self tanning wipes as baby wipes.

[BooMeowson]

Skyping DH's parents when the baby was only a few weeks old. He was a hungry baby and typically only went a few minutes between feeds so I sat off to one side and fed him half way through. We were struggling with feeding so I just stripped off to make it all a bit less fussy for the baby.

Of course, my Darling H wanted to show his Dad something, the baby's sleepsuit maybe and turned the webcam around. Nooo!

[Doubtfuldaphne]

I have a terrible case of foot in mouth syndrome. This is just one example.
When moving in to a new flat I got talking to who I thought was a passer by. "Oh this new flat is great but what's with the old guy upstairs? He is always so scruffy and just comes across really creepy" I went on...
The 'passer by' says "err that's my DAD" and stormed off.
I felt terrible!

[UserError]

My son has a speech delay so, perhaps unwisely, we've not been very careful with what we've said around him. That changed after this:

One of his current fascinations is Peppa Pig. He wants it on pretty much constantly. Fair enough.

I took him shopping with me and as we were walking around the supermarket, he decides to point at every, um, larger gentleman he sees and shout 'Daddy!'. He thinks they look like Daddy Pig. It gets worse.

I'm ignoring him, until he runs up to one man who really did bear a remarkable resemblance to Daddy Pig. He tries to grab his hand and yells 'Fucking Daddy! Mummy, fucking Daddy pig! Mummy fucking pig!'

I never did finish that food shop.

[UserError]

Oh, and the same supermarket but not during the same shop, he befriended a guide dog in training while the owner had stopped to chat. I was loading the shopping onto the conveyor belt, so I didn't notice what was happening until it was too late.

DS had taken a packet of ham off the belt and the dog was happily chowing down. When the owner tried to move off, the dog resolutely plonked himself firmly down, pulling the lady over where she tripped up over crouching DS and ended up with a nasty cut to her face.

DS sat with the dog, both now eating the ham, while I was stammering my apologies and trying to help the lady. Everyone stared. (The lady was shaken up, but ok and laughed it off as 'an experience', which made me cringe even more.)

[insanityscratching]

Ds, now 18, has autism and so has regularly behaved in a way that has drawn attention to himself and us as a family because he doesn't often see the need to conform to social niceties.
Aged about five he had a fascination for bald heads and would get excited and loud when he saw one proclaiming "Bald! B A L D, bald! Not B O L D that's brave" because he had a thing for spelling too.
One hot summer's day we were doing circuits in the park to try and burn off some of his boundless energy when he made a run for it. I went racing after him but wasn't quick enough to get him before he grabbed both ears of a man lay sunbathing so as to lick his bald head.
He was in ecstasy, the bloke was speechless and I was struggling to loosen his grip on the bloke's ears to apologise properly. I think that has to be ds's number one on a whole list of incidents tbh.

[serin]

OMG insanity, I think you have just won the money

[ILoveAFullFridge]

I do not remember this, but my mum has delighted in telling the story at dinner parties ever since.

When I was about 3yo we went on a cruise. On the first night we were invited to dine at the captain's table. I was sitting opposite him, and between courses he invited me to sing a song. Big mistake. I happily stood up on my chair, took a deep breath, opened my mouth to sing, and projectile vomited all over his dress whites.

[surpriseitsme]

Stood in a very long line in a very busy tesco my 3 year old daughter piped up with " mummy do you remember the first time we went stealing and we had to sit with that man in the back room" absolutely mortified and still dont know where she got it from never taken her on a crime spree

[DevotedMotherOf1]

Recently a rather large man with a beer belly got on the bus and stood in front of dd and I. All of a sudden dd pointed at the man and shouted at the top of her lungs

" look mummy that man is from big body squad programme on channel 4!"

I didnt know where to look!

[MrsLion]

Went to visit MIL & PIL. Usual rush and dramas getting 3 dc out of the house.
When we arrive MIL goes to wipe DS(1) mouth as it looks like he had a smear of food around it.
Turns out the smear was actually poo.
Oh the shame and horror!

[Somortifiedcringe]

When I lived alone in a flat in London, my flat had an infestation of silver fish. A man came to get rid of them. As he was leaving, he advised me to 'clean your vibrator before you use it next as I might have sprayed pesticide on it'. I wanted to DIE.

As if this wasn't bad enough, some weeks later he came to audition for me (I worked in a television production company at the time) - turns out he was a professional actor whose day job was pest control.

Yes, he did remember me. Yes, I did want to run and hide somewhere a few thousand miles away.

[ComingtoKent]

Going into a church for a christening with our son aged three.

As we get into the main body of the church with the rest of the guests, our dear son says loudly; "There are a lot of flowers in this pub, mummy."

[MaidOfStars]

Once, my boob fell out of my dress while dancing. At a wedding. With the new groom as my partner. And a mutual friend videoing.

[FudgeyCookie]

My nan and grandad own a caravan in a small village on a holiday park in Cornwall, which we can use. One year my mum invited my friend along with her mum and sister.

All good so far - we decided to go to the village pub for tea to celebrate ring on holiday. Again all good, ate out meals and it was time To walk back to the caravan. I was walking in front of them and suddenly remembered I needed to ask my mum something so I turned around and lent against someones garden wall.

Except it wasn't someone's garden wall, but a hole where the gate should be and I fell straight back into their garden, where my foot proceeded to get caught in their gate while everyone I was with couldn't stop laughing!

[ducklady]

When I was little I got the toilet training seat stuck round my neck. My mother had to walk me to a neighbour to get it cut off. She should have used some flora!
Even my children wont let me forget it!

[WynkenBlynkenandNod]

After much pleading from DD for years we finally made the decision to get a dog. Did all the usual research, knew that it would be DH and I doing all the work etc. What no one tells you when getting a dog is the embarrassment factor owning a dog can cause.

There have been a number of moments but the one that still makes me cringe is the incident of the builder and the used sanitary towel. We ripped our upstairs to pieces so our dear children could have lovely bedrooms. Guy dong the building work about my age, not unpleasant to look at I had vaguely noticed.

Needed to discuss something with him so went upstairs to see him. There were a number of black bin bags full of rubbish and I had chucked a used sanitary towel in one. We walked into one room only to find my delightful dog had retrieved it fron the bag and was in the process of ripping it to pieces all over the floor. There really wasn't as doubt as to what it was and I just couldn't think of any words to make it better. Didn't need to turn the heating on that night as the red glow of my face heated the house most effectively.

[FreeWee]

I was walking to the Robbie Williams gig at Knebworth when I spotted the chap who played Joel from Neighbours but for the life of me I couldn't remember his name. I called my friend and left a message asking if she could remember. She phoned back a bit later while we were still walking. She said "Joel from Neighbours is called Daniel Macpherson". "DANIEL MACPHERSON" I exclaimed loudly. "That's it!" My friend has started laughing hysterically and tapping me on the shoulder. I turn round to see the chap whose name I've just shouted out walking behind me with ALL of his friends wetting themselves! It was a VERY long walk to the gig after that! Blushing just thinking about it! Because he really is very attractive in the flesh

[AndHarry]

I don't know if this really counts because I was too tired to care but...

When DD was tiny I breastfed her so took to wearing shirts for easy access. One time I took her food shopping and fed her in the car before going into the supermarket. I managed a full shop, loading the shopping into the boot, returning the trolley and putting DD into her carseat before I realised that I'd left my shirt unbuttoned down to my waist and had been wandering around Tesco flashing my bra.

I did it again two weeks later

[Amibambini]

While being a skint student, maybe 19 or 20, I decided to take up my friends offer of covering her shift as a model for a life drawing class at a local college. I was also studying art at the time and had drawn a few naked people, so was fairly nonplussed about it all. We're all adults and artists, right, how difficult could it be?
I walk in, first person I see in the class is my boyfriends ex. Awkward hello's. Proceed to disrobe, take my position up on a low box and stare seriously into the middle distance willing myself not to dissolve into giggles, and the silent, serious drawing begins. After a while the lecturer decides that everything is going smoothly enough that he can nip out for a quick fag break. Up on my box, I had became aware of a creeping sensation of lightheaded-ness, unaware that standing stock still for a long length of time can lower blood pressure. Too late, before I had even started to form a sentence requesting a short break, I had blacked out and not-very-elegantly toppled from my naked perch onto the floor, biting my tounge in the process. I come around with a perfect view of the door, just as the lecturer walks back in, his face dropping with horror as he takes in the scene of me stark naked on my back, blood coming out of my mouth, surrounded by terrified looking students while a lovely mature lady student held my legs in the air to get the blood back to my head.

Oh the shame.

My city was quite small, years later random people would approach me in the street and ask if I was the girl who nakedly knocked herself out in an art class.

[THERhubarb]

I had signed my daughter up for pre-school, 5 mornings a week and what the pre-school staff liked to do was home visits to meet the child in their home environment and get to know them a little better before they started nursery.

They turned up in our little house and we got chatting about dd and her likes/dislikes. They asked dd if she had any pets, which we did, 3 goldfish only when we had jokingly named the goldfish we hadn't ever thought that dd would be questioned about it so to my horror dd pipes up "yes we have 3 goldfish and their names are Death, Lard and Spew!" The nursery manager raised an eyebrow and merely wrote something in her notepad.

My mortification however was not over because dd was playing with her favourite toy of the week - her microwave. As I was chatting to the nursery manager and worker, dd proceeded to put her head into the toy microwave and turn it on. I am studiously ignoring her at this point but I can see from their sideways glances that they are watching as she then plonks her head onto a plastic plate and walking over to me, hands me a knife and fork and announces that she has cooked her head for me to eat!

Another embarrassing moment was when the teacher at primary school gently takes me to one side and explains that a few pencils have gone missing and that dd may have taken them (she was only in reception at this stage) but that I wasn't to worry as these things happen all the time. I was adament that my daughter would not take anything from school and so I call her over and ask if she has taken any pencils. She of course denies it but as she is doing so the teacher leans over and takes a pencil that was poking out of dd's pocket. I then look in her coat pockets and find a treasure trove of pencils, sharpeners, rubbers, etc. I had to backtrack very very quickly!

[MackerelOfFact]

Watching the Flora buttery advert with DCs is faintly embarrassing.

Why did you make sexual references in a cute, cartoon advert narrated by children, buttery folk?