Is this it?

[BalesofHay]

How to do deal with life when you realise it’s really not what you expected?

It’s not the family life I thought it would be. I never feel settled. Adult DD AuDHD can be difficult, Adult DS has his own life so wouldn’t dream of bothering him. I don’t feel close to either of them. Me and DH are ok ish but more like friends sharing a house than a marriage.
So sorry, ranting, but I have no one else to tell!

I totally get this. We're surviving life with 3 ASD teens whilst being ASD ourselves, DH and I. It's chronically stressful and what we can do as a family is so limited.
Sometimes I can accept it, at other times it enrages me.
Sorry, no advice but I hear what you're saying loud and clear.

Sorry you can relate. The isolation of it all can be so very hard to deal with. I keep trying to tell myself others have it worse but I just wish it would all go away sometimes.

I am finding this time of year especially hard - I actually enjoy January more than December!
It's shit, it really is, but you are not alone even though you really feel it.
It's good that you can say it on here at least, many people on this board will get it and how lonely it is sometimes.