How do you get your AuDHD teen with demand avoidant tendencies to revise?

[Foxxo]

or do homework in year 11?

just that.. because i'm stumped. my DD15 has the same profile as me (both audhd, both demand avoidant) but NOTHING i did/tried for myself as a teen is working with her, and i'm at a loss.

help? Advise? anything i can try.

My DS is Y9 but he does homework in school where possible. He is on a part-time timetable and used to have rest breaks but now uses those breaks to do homework with some support.

I don't know how we'll manage revising. I think he will probably need to do fewer GCSEs as he becomes very stressed and overwhelmed if he doesn't get time for his hobby.

What worked for you if you don't mind me asking?

honestly, just wanting the marks i needed to do my a levels, and my parents letting me set my own schedule. Don't get me wrong, i didn't do massive amounts, but with homework i was more anxious about getting into trouble for not doing it, and revision i made such good notes, i'd just re-read them. I LIKE learning, i still do at my age. DD apparently doesn't share that thirst.

I'm currently fighting my daughters very black and white 'home is for rest, school is for work' mindset. i was hoping her desire to do a course at college that she is REALLY excited for would motivate her, but apparently not. The only subject she will work on at home is her Art, and occasionally she does her maths.

i think i may have to start telling her that school intervention times (after school extra exam revision) are no longer voluntary after half term.

Homework club at school could help if DD will stay to that.

Also, really looking at homework and what is actually necessary.

Can the school facilitate DD dropping a subject or 2 and work/revise on other subjects during that time?

Would DD use apps like Tassomai?

i think i may have to start telling her that school intervention times (after school extra exam revision) are no longer voluntary after half term

I think that might be the way to go.