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SN teens and young adults

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18 year old won't work

7 replies

fizzypop100 · 21/10/2024 11:26

DS finished college in July. He asked to do a bricklaying course. He has to attend a registration day and then a health and safely course. He missed the initial registration as he refused to get out of bed. I told them he was poorly so they asked him to attend today instead. But again, he is refusing to get up and had called me idiot, telling me to shut up etc .
This means he won't be able to do the health and safety course and then won't get on any bricklaying jobs.
Should I ask him to leave? he uses weed and spends a lot of his time out and about, going between different people he knows who might have some.
He has ADHD and keeps doing risky things. Latest one was standing on a narrow ledge of a bridge, with a busy road. Another friend of his showed me the video of the incident. He was stood on the ledge laughing and obviously thought it was hilarious. Another time he was riding on the back of a moving tram. When I challenge him about behaviour he just says "proove it then".
I feel he is vulnerable due to his neurodisability but he's making our lives so difficult. We can't leave him in the house alone because he let's people in who we can't have in the house (they smoke weed etc). On one occasion, his dad popped out for 10 minutes and DS agreed that was ok. He was in bed anyway. When his dad got back home, the living room window was left wide open. He had climbed out of it !
I feel that if I ask him to leave it will just ruin any relationship we have left. But how long can we put up with this behaviour?
He's still in bed now. I've been up multiple times and he hasn't got out of bed.

OP posts:
PolaroidPrincess · 08/11/2024 22:27

All f this sounds incredibly difficult. Does he have any medication for his ADHD?

duvet · 15/11/2024 17:57

His risky behaviour sounds like perhaps it might be worth going to vulnerable services and maybe a social worker might help?

PolaroidPrincess · 15/11/2024 18:44

How are you now @fizzypop100?

fizzypop100 · 12/01/2025 21:25

duvet · 15/11/2024 17:57

His risky behaviour sounds like perhaps it might be worth going to vulnerable services and maybe a social worker might help?

What's vulnerable services ?

OP posts:
PolaroidPrincess · 12/01/2025 21:31

I have no idea either @fizzypop100.

Perhaps @duvet can tell us?

BrightYellowTrain · 13/01/2025 13:36

Maybe that poster means adult social care which is sometimes called vulnerable adult service. Or some areas have a vulnerable adult service as part of healthcare.

duvet · 14/01/2025 18:55

I went to my council buildings and asked to speak to someone regarding a vulnerable person and safeguarding. They might be called single point of access??

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