Please or to access all these features

SN teens and young adults

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on SN.

Who do I get help from for a fifteen year old girl with special needs who suffers from anxiety

5 replies

Lottiesock · 16/07/2024 16:20

My granddaughter is 15 and has special needs possibly Learning disability. She is a model student in school. She is caring , compassionate and always willing to help with anyone struggling. She appears to work hard and is making slow progress. At home she is extremely demanding and asks the same question repeatedly. She is never satisfied with an answer. It could be that she forgets that she has asked the question already but it is very wearing for her mother, my daughter She is very patient most of the time but sometimes it becomes too much. An example of her behaviour is , she has very long beautiful hair but she will only wear it pulled as tightly as possible into a high, very high pony tail. The result is that she appears to be losing hair and there is a red mark across her scalp. Any suggestion she wears it loose She will become so upset that she will be sick , feeling faint and generally distressed. She will ask repeatedly that she can have her hair tight and it is the first thing she says on awaking. The same thing happens with eating. She will only tolerate a very restrictive diet and becomes hysterical if you try to force her to eat or even encourage to eat what she doesn’t want to eat. All the tricks of the trade are used to include vegetables etc into her diet such as blending them up and disguising them in a sauce. But it is a battle all the time. She is anxious about someone in her bedroom and won’t go up the stairs alone. She will not sleep on her own. Her mother having to sleep in a bed in her room. Everything has been done to encourage her to be independent but to no avail. She has had a test for autism which was proved negative. What I would like to know who could we turn to to help with the anxiety and behaviours she displays. I would like to know how to deal with the difficulties which would help my daughter and granddaughter. Xxx

OP posts:
BrumToTheRescue · 16/07/2024 19:27

Has DGD been referred to CAMHS (and potentially paeds too depending on who does what in your local area)? If not, DD should speak to the GP.

When was the autism assessment?

The issues with hair sound like sensory issues. Has DGD had a sensory OT assessment? DD may find the books The Out of Sync Child helpful.

About DGD’s eating, look at ARFID. DD could request a referral to dietetics or a specialist ARFID service. What is DGD’s weight like? How much is she managing to eat? In the meantime, DD should keep offering safe food and will DGD take a multivitamin?

Does DGD take anything to help with sleep?

Does DGD have an EHCP? What support is the school providing?

Lottiesock · 17/07/2024 19:06

Thank you for your reply . I have looked at CAMHS and will pass it on to my daughter. The autism assessment was expensive and rather unsatisfactory. It mainly said that she was not autistic and implied that she had a learning disability rather than a learning difficulty. We are waiting for a further assessment which is supposed to confirm the diagnosis. I am sure the hair is a sensory issue but she has not had an assessment for that. .i will look at the book you suggested. She is not under or overweight but what she eats of mainly unsuitable food is large quantities. She always asks for more however much you offer her. I feel she will put on unwanted weight with the amount of rubbish she eats. She does take a vitamin tablet ( sometimes).

she does not take anything to sleep. She does have an EHCP and goes to a special school. She struggles with maths and English and her reading age is very low. Thanks for your interest. Lottiesock

OP posts:
BrumToTheRescue · 17/07/2024 19:22

If DGD has an EHCP, DD needs to request an early review of the EHCP. On their website IPSEA has a model letter you can use.

OT, including sensory integration OT, and MH support (as well as SALT) can be included in there. If the LA won’t make the necessary amendment following the review, DD will be able to appeal and seek independent assessments.

It is worth DD requesting a referral to CAMHS/paed/a sleep clinic to look at trialling medication to aid sleep. Usually the first one tried is melatonin.

Do you think the autism assessment was unsatisfactory because they didn’t diagnose? Or was there something else about it? Because it may be DGD doesn’t have ASD. Sometimes a LD can present similarly.

Lottiesock · 13/08/2024 12:06

Sorry only just got back to reading this reply. Thank you I will follow up a review of the Ehcp and the sleep clinic. I think they are very much needed About the autism assessment it found she was on the spectrum but only very mildly and concentrated on the Learing disability. We now need help to find out how we can help her in the future. She was 15 yesterday and time is going quickly. We realise more and more that she is not ready for the grown up world.

OP posts:
BrumToTheRescue · 13/08/2024 21:01

EHCPs can continue until 25, or 26 in some cases, so try not to panic about that side of things.

If social care isn’t currently providing any support, it is worth DD requesting assessments from them. A carer’s assessment for DD and an assessment by the disabled children’s team for DGD.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page