2 days into term and I’m broken

[VeryGoodVeryNice]

New school after a year of being out of school. Now year 9. Two days in and I’ve had 3 phone calls about her behaviour and one meeting. Her behaviour towards me has gone from horrible to unbearable. I don’t want to do this anymore. Honestly don’t think I have it in me.

Luckily, for my 2 school days are gone but I remember the horror so biggest sympathies. The big question is if she is getting as much support as she needs to ease the transition (probably not from your OP) & if there is anything else you could ask school to implement that might help. Was the meeting supportive or condemnatory. Does she have an EHCP and, if so, is it being followed. For ds2 we never found a school that was a good fit and ended up eventually with an EOTAS arrangement which worked much better for him.

No EHCP, I tried earlier this year but they wouldn’t even assess as not enough evidence 🙄. The meeting was supportive, it was with the SENCO and head of house to try and get her school passport sorted, but she refused to answer any questions, it was all eye rolling and “whatevers” and “what’s it to you” etc. She’s already been kicked out of 3 lessons in the first two days. She’s not interested in even attempting to give it a go there.

What support is the school providing?

Did you appeal the EHCNA refusal?

Request another EHCNA and appeal if refused.

The school aren’t really doing anything yet as she’s new and they don’t know her, they want to put things in place for her but they need to get to know her to know what will be right for her.

I didn’t appeal as she was out of school at the time and basically they were saying that she managed ok at primary, and it could have just been her last secondary that was the problem, and maybe she’d be ok somewhere else. I will apply again at the end of this month as it will have been 6 months then, and I think it’s clear that it wasn’t her last school that was the problem.

Leaving DD without support until the school gets to know her better sets her up to fail. The type of support may change over time when DD has been there longer, but they should be providing support now.

Don’t wait to request another EHCNA.

I thought you couldn’t apply again for 6 months after they refused to assess?

You can.

If LA had actually carried out an EHCNA there would be no right of appeal within 6 months if you requested another needs assessment the LA refused. But you said the LA refused to assess, so that doesn’t apply to you.

That’s good to know. I’ll speak to the school about it on Monday and see if they want to do it or whether I should do it myself again. She got booted out of 2 lessons today so I think considering she’s been there for 3 days and been chucked out of 5 lessons already, they’re probably beginning to get the picture.

Speak to the school but make the EHCNA request yourself. That way it is submitted ASAP rather than at some point in the future.