Blunt v rudeness ?

[WashingDrying]

My DD is 21 and has a diagnosis of ADHD and ASD. I find her at times really blunt to the point of being rude, especially to me. There’s been a few times when my feelings have been so hurt I’ve wanted to cry.

I can’t recall when she was younger her ever being this way.

How do you cope? Am I doing something wrong by ignoring or should I perhaps challenge?

Hi,
I have a teenager with Autism and for many years have worked with adults with learning disabilities.
I would challenge, but not in a defensive way or as a telling off. I’ve always found it helpful to break down what has been said and why it may hurt the person it has been said to.
In my work I have found it particularly helpful to create charts with two sides, one side with what is acceptable to say and one with what isn’t acceptable to say.
I then make examples of things that could be said , write them on slips of paper and ask the person I’m working with to place the slip in what section they think is correct.
Afterwards we work through the sections and talk about the sections the person has put the answers in and talk about why they chose that section and if needed, why they should or shouldn’t be in that place.
I hope this makes sense.
In my sons younger years he said many things that myself and others found hurtful, but he found it difficult differentiating between hurting others and being told to always tell the truth.