I can't believe I'm going to write this.
A few nights ago my son, 12, (diagnosed ASD from 6 years old) and I, had an altercation in our house.
It started with the usual tantrum from him, and then him grabbing me by the neck, breaking my jewellery and ending in him with scratches on his own neck due to my long nails when fighting him off.
We were both very scared after this, cried, and fell asleep in my bed. It has not been discussed since.
He spent a day off school the next day, and now he has 2 large scratches on his neck, inflicted by me. I can't bring myself to talk to him about it, and we are both acting as normal.
I don't know what to do. I worry about our future. And most of all I hate myself. I have hurt my child and if he goes to school with those scratches what the hell will they think? How does a grown woman explain grabbing her son's neck in retaliation to him doing it? I can't even explain this to myself.