Do you get overnight respite for your young person?

[Agincourt]

I just want to know whether I am being so unreasonable requsteing it...I doubt I am, I just wanted other peoples experiences

sld, autism, moderate physical disabilities including scoliosis, chronic epilepsy, challenging behavior...amongst other things

oops sorry about typos

Yes I get overnight respite for dd, have done since she was 6(severe cp)
IMO you should ask for it.

I have requested it but my SW is saying she isn't disabled enough

My DD(17) has had overnight respite since the age of 3 at a childrens hospice (so not funded by LA).
Many of DD's school friends who have many of the conditions you describe go to overnight respite in a LA funded placement to facilities run by national childrens charities.
Ask your LA for a copy of their assessment and eligibility criteria for overnight respite in your area. Did your social worker actually do an assessment or did she just skip straight to the 'fobbing off' stage?
The assessment generally looks at the family situation in addition to the child's condition. eg are there other siblings to consider, is it a one parent family, are there extended family members who can help out, challenging behaviour affecting family life etc etc...
From what you have described, I fail to see how your child is "not disabled enough" to qualify

we have no extended family close at all and I know nobody really in the area that would be able to even have my other children for me, let alone my daughter. She is severely disabled and complex in many ways, attends an sld/pmld school etc. and I was told last week by her teacher in a totally unrelated incident that she was the only child going on their school resi trip that hadn't had overnight respite and that the others had it regular She is 13 now and we have hormones flying and amongst her complexities I really DO need a break which doesn';t involve me fetching and carrying her to some social services youth group miles and miles away from my home.

SW has done some sort of assessment but not a core one apparently, I am at my wits end tbh

of a holiday we literally lock ourselves indoors and don't go out at all because I cannot cope with going out with all of the children on my own. SW seems to think because she goes on out on a 1-2-1 for 3 hours once a fortnight and she 'behaves' for them it's exactly the same as me taking her out unaccompanied with other children, including a toddler they haven't even taken on board that if she needs changing whilst we are out she has to be changed IN FRONT of her siblings, who are of the opposite sex which is completely undignified not only for her, but for her brothers as well.

thanks for replying btw. I feel I am going to go into ranty mode though :(