Just found out that dt1 is going to stay on the Special Needs Register for September, year 5

[drinkmoretea]

Really upset, worried, feel like I've failed him. I don't even completely understand why he's on there and by that I mean he hasn't been given a 'label' the only way I can explain what he is like is a little slow, has been tested for dyslexia twice and told not that but apart from having an IEP, I just don't know. Should I be asking more questions? Doing anything else?

I find it hard as dt2 is not like this, I mean he is average... Not worried about him. But they are identical twins so find it hard that they are so different.

Any advice anyone can give me would be welcome, just don't know what I should be doing.

Have you taken him to a doctor t try and get him diagnosed? What is on his IEP?

Not been to doctors, wouldn't really know what to say?

IEP targets are:
Consistently spell months of the year correctly.
Recognize and recall 3 x table.
Add two 2 digit numbers together recognizing hundreds, tens and units.

I think he is working at level 2a.

how old is he, which year group?

Year 5 so about 9/10?
I think you need to be a little more pushy with the school insist on an EP assessment and ask your GP for a referral to your community paediatrician.

You need to push things fast. I think that once a child gets to secondary school, a statement is MUCH harder to get.

What intervention are they giving?

He is yr4 now 9, 10 in 6 months.

What's an EP assessment? What should I say the the GP?

He has an IEP, with School Action. What do you mean by intervention? He has reading everyday and in various other groups for extra help...

Thank you by the way...

You haven't failed him. its just that many schools cannot effectively work with children who are dyslexic. These children are intelligent but they need to be taught differently.

EP assessment is an Educational pyschologist assessment. These are mainly done within schools. These are also like gold dust; they usually only visit schools a couple of times a year.

I would ask the GP for a referral to a developmental paediatrician.

Do you think he is dyslexic?. Who previously did the dyslexia assessments?.

I thought he was Dyslexic, I had looked on the website and he 'ticked' a lot of boxes, which is why I asked for them (school) to test him again which they did and said he's not, not even close

You will only fail him if you refuse to accept that he needs help, or think that because he's a twin that he should be like his brother.
being on the SN register means he's going to continue to get specific, targeted help. It's a good thing.
Average for end of Y4 is 3b.

GC- it's the complete opposite! I know he needs helps, that's why I'm here, I don't know how to help.
I don't expect him to be like his brother I just don't understand how they can be so different when they are identical and have had the exact same schooling, upbringing etc.
I agree being on the SEN register is good if he continues to get help. I would just like more of an explanation I think, and yes if that means 'labelling' him then at least I will have more of an idea of what to do to help.

Currently I have family questioning why he is on the SEN, all I can say is because he is struggling at school, nothing specific.

My ds2 was on placed on the SEN Register half way through reception year, because he was significantly behind the other children in his year. He is nt (sorry neurotypical, so has no special needs as far as we are aware) and just needed extra help to get him through. Initally they thought he had slipped back due to a prolonged period of illness (nearly died from encapsulted pneumonia in December 2008) but personally I feel he wasn't achieving long before he fell ill.

Via the SEN register and his IEP he had additional, targetted support in the areas he was struggling, both in class, in little groups and occasionally 1-1.

He is now just about to go into year 2 and has just been taken off the register as he is now achieving at a much higher standard. In fact his teachers and the SENCO said that he has come on so much in the past six months that he is way ahead of all the groups he is in and will be moved up to the next group on entry to year 2. He is only now at age 6 1/2 starting to find his feet academically, but once he got going he has gone from strength to strength. I'm sure your ds will find his way as well.

I suppose my point is that some children just aren't as academic as others and some sometimes need additional support to help bring them on. Its by no means an indication that they will always struggle, just that they need more help at this particular moment in time. Its good that the school has recognised this and are giving him the extra support he currently needs.

I do understand how you are feeling though, as until ds2 went on the SEN Register I had never even heard of it and was quite upset at first. I felt I must have done something wrong, as his brother is extremely academically able and we had stupidly assumed that ds2 would follow suit. I too wondered how it was that they had both been brought up the same yet ended up so differently abled iyswim. I know your two are twins and that would make it seem more like they should be evenly matched, but I'm sure they too have their own strengths/ weaknesses, likes and dislikes etc. I guess to a certain extent, even twins are individuals.

I now realise that my boys have very different personalities and likes and dislikes etc so it naturally follows that each child is an individual whose strengths and weaknesses will also be individual. Ds1 is very academic, brilliant with facts, computers etc and ds2 is very creative, loves music, art and drama etc. They both have strengths, just in different areas.

I know its difficult to accept at first, but being on the SEN Register isn't a bad thing, its good. It means he is getting the help he needs to achieve his potential.

If however, you feel in your heart/gut that there is something more to his struggles, you can either go to your GP to discuss your concerns and ask for referral to a Developmental Paediatrician or ask the school to have him assessed by an Educational Psychologist.

If you are thinking dyslexia, but he has been tested and they say its not that, have you considered the possiblity of dypraxia? Lots of people think of dyspraxia as just being bad a sport and not able to ride a bike etc, but there's far more to it than that. Some of the indicators are very similar to dyslexia and the two things can sometimes go together which can make it difficult to separate them out iyswim The Dyspraxia Foundation Website is a good place to find out more.

hth

School action is bugger all in terms of support; he would get a bit more support on school action plus (this is where outside agencies are involved; people like a developmental paed for instance).

Many schools are not very good when it comes to dyslexia testing or even helping these children with their learning. Many schools s well are unaware of dyslezia completely. These children cannot access the NC and need to be taught differently. My son's junior school does not even think dyslexia exists - to the overall detriment of the children who are dyslexic.

The only way you are going to get an explantion is to be as proactive as possible and ask questions of people like the paediatrician (whom you can access via the GP).

Also Dyslexia action are worth contacting as well as well as the previous website moosemama mentioned.

I would ask to be referred to the Educational Psychologist. If he is still at 2a he is falling behind so it is worth finding out if there are any underlying problems.
Who tested him for Dyslexia? If it was the school do they have any specific training in Dyslexia or did they just use an "at risk" checklist? He is getting quite a lot of help if he is reading every day. My DS was heard to read once in a blue moon at Junior School, so they are obviously trying to help him.

And don't feel you have failed him. The fact that you have posted on here shows you are a caring Mum who wants to help him.

Sorry but unless your school has had your son do a full day of tests for dyslexia they have not tested him (it should ideally be done by an Educational Psychologist, but specially trained teachers can do it too). He has probably just been screened for dyslexia which is not the same thing.
In your position if the school won't help I would write to the LA and ask for him to be assessed. (SENDIST I think have letters to help with this.) You could also call the British Dyslexia Association helplines, they may be able to give you local help and knowledge.

Good luck! I am sure you are a great Mum.

2a is very low...when I went to the doctor with my son I didnt have to say much...i just said what he was like and said I wanna know whats wrong with him and she is referring him to a paed now

MM thanks for your post, as you mentioned I was one of those people who thought Dyspaxia was about balance etc, however briefly looking at the site I can def tick alot of the boxes in the 'by age 7' box. More along the lines of not being able to follow more than one instruction, that was actually on his last IEP, he had to repeat back instructions. The 'boxes' he doesn't 'tick' are the sport, tying shoelaces etc. Really intersting to read it will have a better look tonight.

Thank you for sharing though x

I think he was 'tested' for Dyslexia by the Ed Psycologist, but sure it wasn't all day.

Have just made app to speak to the SEN coordinator at school, what questions should I be asking?

Reading the post above has also reminded me that at pre school and in reception he was top of the group.. Both DT were, I think I will get out every school report and take with me for meeting, as in checking how he has or has not improved.

Thank you for all your advice, and please keep it coming, I'm open to all suggestions.

Oh god! Sorry for all the spelling mistakes, currently typing from my iPhone while at work!

Hi, definitely look at his school reports then. I think they are expected to go up two sublevels every year and a stage every two years. If your ds hasn't been doing that when he was initially doing very well it needs looking into properly.

Ironically, since ds2 went onto the register my ds1 has been given a verbal diagnosis of Aspergers and possibly/probably dyspraxia. As I said, he is academically very able, but he struggles with organisation, concentration, following instructions, handwriting, full stops, spacing between words, capital letters, letter size and formation and using a ruler, as well as other issues including social and communication stuff.

At my last meeting with the SENCO I took examples of my his work across all the year groups so that she could see first hand what progress he had/hadn't made. I also took work that we do at home together to prove that he had/hadn't made progress with his fine motor skills (handwriting etc) despite being given a lot of extra help at home right from Reception year (he is just going into year 4 now). It was this evidence that the SENCO could actually see, that made the biggest difference to how the IEP was drawn up this time.

At the previous meeting they went on about children having handwriting problems because the parents don't give them enough help at home - I was furious, as we have always done a lot of extra work on handwriting and fine motor stuff and I also spend hours every week sitting with both my boys while they do their homework. This time their jaws literally dropped when they saw all his extra work from home and they had to admit that he gets a lot more help than the majority of children and yet still can't do these things, so its obviously something that needs properly addressing.

Unfortunately for ds1, he slipped through the net because, as he performs highly in tests regardless of how he struggles in class, his previous teachers simply refused to 'see' there was a problem. Because he always got good reports and was 'achieving' we had no idea how much he was struggling with his class work until this year.

Do you think it was around entry to juniors that your ds started to struggle? This is the most common time for problems to become more noticeable. Children who have previously done well start to struggle, as they are having to cope with a lot of extra demands on them (being expected to remember things and organise themselves etc) as well as harder work and changing social environment in the playground.

If he has already seen the Ed Psych through the school and it has proved fruitless, I would go to your GP and ask for a referral to a Paediatrician at this stage. That's what we did with ds1 - he had a verbal diagnosis after 6 weeks, but is now having to wait 12 months for a multidisciplinary assessment at the local specialist ASD assessment unit. These things take forever in a lot of places so its best to get the ball rolling as soon as possible.

So do I go to the doctors alone or take dt1 with me?

We didn't take ds1 to the doctors the first time, as we were voicing our concerns and he at the time was unaware of there being a problem.

We spoke to him about it before the Paediatric appointment though and he now knows that we are seeing some doctors and other medical people who are hoping to be able to help him with some of the things he struggles with at school.

If you have a multi-doctor practice, its worth asking if any of them have paediatrics as their speciality/area of particular interest and book an appointment with him/her.

Thanks MM, will do that..