Doc has confirmed what we thought DS is most likely ASD. What now?

[Kurly]

DS (3) with SLD and now verbal dx of autism. Development doc has referred him to see specialist for further assessments.

Am trying to stay positive but if I am honest I am finding it hard. We knew it was coming but its still hard to take in.

Have two things I could really do with some help with. Can anyone recommend a book that would help us understand ASD in more detail? Number two how do you find good nursery/pre-schools? DS is going to an assessment nursery in sept for two mornings but his doc said he also needs somewhere else. Doc said pre-school we were thinking of is not good for SN also I would like him to go somewhere where they have specialist knowledge.

Any other advice gladly received

If the Doc said the one youa re looking at isn't good, I would ask him where is tbh. Also ask your HV; some are bad but our old HV suggested one i'd never have thought about (a montessori) adn it was hugely influential on ds1. just wish i'd known about it 2 yeras earlier as he only got 6 months there before school.

What level of book are you after? If you email me today I have a set of powerpoints to send to soeone oon MN from my MA in ASD; would be happy to pop off to youa s well, peaches and cream 04 @ bt internet . com (no sapces).

Entry level book, strategies ideas or professional level guide?

My DS1 is at a Montessori, organised before we had any kind of diagnosis. He has a 1-1 support worker there, funded by the LEA's early years inclusion team. This was surprisingly easy to get and didn't take very long (unlike statementing). He is getting on very well there. They tend to have a higher staff-child ratio there anyway, but they are more expensive than state nurseries as you have to pay on top of the grant.

I would ask Doc, but also get in touch with your local ASD support group and see where they would suggest.

Oh and I'm sorry about the diagnosis. Its rubbish isn't it, even though you might have been expecting it. I found the first week or so after we had the diagnosis I was very very low and in tears a lot, but I am feeling a bit better now (we only had our diagnosis last month).

Montessori an be good; the criteria IME is the character of the staff but as a method it was designmed for kids with SN first and foremost.

my ds is at a Montessori too & he's doing pretty well there (it isn't our primary educational setting (ABA at home)) but it is calmer/quieter/lots of out door opportunities/higher staff ratio/more highly trained staff than other preschools we visited. DS is a very 'Montessori' child - v. neat/organised so it suits him, they are also willing to ignore the standard early years 'let them be self directed' which doesn't work with many ASD preschoolers (well not if you want them doing constructive activities anyway).

Think staff attitudes are more important than methodology though - I know they adore my ds, his keyworker changed her hours so she could be with him & she's doing ABA training with us at home.

I think More Than Words (Hanen) is really good as far as books go - I don't like a lot of autism books they just peddle out the same old stereotypes, Hanen is far more individualised, addressing need rather than diagnosis.

I second More Than Words - we found it very useful. I also like the material by Stanley Greenspan.
My DS goes to a Montessori nursery, but I think (like the other mums here) that attitudes are key. Our nursery didn't have experience of ASD before, but have made an effort to learn alongside us.

Yes of course fabulous Stanley Greenspan The Child with Special Needs is great but not a quick read. I love his approach.

it's not for everyone though; I like aspects of it but other bits don;t work for me at all (and if your child doesn't fall into a narrower than DSM definition it's not the best IME)

Definitely something to read but maybe not as introductory?

Lorna Wing's The autistic spectrum: a guide for aprents and practitioners is a staple, very well regarded; also anything by Uta Frith, Temple Grandin, Olga Bogdashina. baron-Chohen is a famous name albeit controversial, worth a read though; likewise Attwood (focuses ono higher functioning kids / AS but if your child is in MS Nursery you may well find lots of useful ideas- I did for ds3 who is in a SNU)

Or maybe think about something by Luke Jackson as a start, a first person experience? typing autism into Amazon has all these.

The out-of-sync child will also make a lot of sense

currently reading 'overcoming autism' by Lynn Koegel, its quite easy to dip in and out of

If you join Cerebra, they have a parent lending library which is really good.
I second the out of sync child.

If SLD + autism you should be able to look at any of special school nurseries in and out of area. If you have a SLD dx then you can sometimes avoid the presumption of mainstream. Ask your local NAS or autism group branch for recommendations.
Some of them have just fab sensory rooms and stuff which might be useful for SLD/autism and also high staff ratio
If you go for mainstream you will just get 1:1 from someone who is unlikely to have any expertise in autism
Most specialist nurseries take from age 2
The assessment nursery would usually be the local special school nursery??
Usually if considered appropriate they would offer a more fulltime place? Here under 5's get up to 3 full days.
But also look around even in neighbouring authorities or private settings / ASD nurseries etc

I think children's centres with a pre-school nursery are good for children with special needs as they have (or are supposed to have) better access to informationa dn support form other services

Not sure if it's the right book for you at the moment, but I got a lot out of Ten things every child with autism wishes you knew

I agree with above about 'More than Words' and 'The Out of Sync Child'.

Try to get on Early Bird course as you will meet people whose children have recently been diagnosed and who live around the area.

Also found 'Daniel isn't talking' a novel, quite inspiring.