What do you say to strangers who speak to your non-verbal child?

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

I have probably asked this before, but can't remember.

Was just out with DD to park..am very pleased, we got bus both ways, no buggy, it was really busy and she behaved very well and held my hand...

We were waiting at the bus stop and this nice kindly man started talking to DD and asking her questions as people do to young children (he thought she was older than 3 though).

DD actually said "hiya" to him, which is a breakthrough but he didn't realise as she wasn't looking at him and acting very "spaced out" so it looked like she was totally ignoring him. Eventually he gave up and seemed embarrassed.

I don't like to say anything about DD's SN in front of her as if I have to make excuses for her, and I am shy, so I tend to leave people to work it out or think we are rude.

Just wondered what everyone else does in this situation?

I am probably the most self-conscious person on earth at the moment so extra-sensitive.

TIA.

Fanjo my DS's delay is about 18months also no idea on prognosis. We do prompt him knowing he is very unlikely to reply in the hope that it will help him learn about communication. For example when we give him something we say say thanks. He has started saying please when he wants something which is lovely to hear

Have you asked about prognosis? The reason I ask is that I have asked and docs etc.. have been reluctant to give one.

Star - that wouldn't work yet, she gives no indication of having much understanding at all really, just understands the odd phrase, like "change nappy". If i were to talk to her in a long sentence like that she would tune me out or do something else. She has just this week got the idea that you can communicate with people and they are interesting, but all she does is say "hiya" repeatedly. The nursery teacher did bend down and say "bye" to her today and she looked at her and said "ah ah" but that's probably the first time she has actually ever responded to anyone other than me really. We have such a way to go.

Kurly - I haven't asked for a prognosis yet as we have not got a diagnosis, have only had things ruled out so far, noone knows what is going on with DD..she used to have good clear speech, and she has some enormous motor planning problems. She has the neurologists stumped.

DS1 is verbal, but often doesn't reply, even with prompting, so I do tell people that he doesn't seem to feel like talking at the moment and remind him afterwards that it's nice to say hello back to people.

DS2 is pretty much non-verbal, so I out and out tall people that he doesn't talk.

don't know if this helps, my ds has really clear hiya and bye but nowt else verbally. but lots of signs. I tend to say ds doesn't speak he signs instead. (and then usually no he is not deaf he signs because he has special needs)
I don't go into what or why but it means people don't assume he is just being rude and don't mind being said 'hiya' to a dozen times! he is 3.5 but looks about 5, so similar issues to lots of other mns. Don't know if he will add more speech as they don't really know why the signing sticks and the speech doesn't...

Thanks. I don't know if signing would work as DD has such bad motor planning problems, she finds it impossible to do actions to a song and can only JUST point.

Was a bit sad today, we were at park and a little boy who was probably younger was trying to talk to her and be friends, she was ignoring him and got a bit upset, he was asking his daddy what was wrong, and what had happened to upset her, his empathy was lovely, but a bit painful!!

Thanks. I don't know if signing would work as DD has such bad motor planning problems, she finds it impossible to do actions to a song and can only JUST point.

Was a bit sad today, we were at park and a little boy who was probably younger was trying to talk to her and be friends, she was ignoring him and got a bit upset, he was asking his daddy what was wrong, and what had happened to upset her, his empathy was lovely, but a bit painful!!

oops, pc blip there.