DD1 kicked her teacher and pulled/pinched her arm :(

[lou031205]

So I suppose this was bound to be coming, right? Her SENCO/1:1 leaves, it is obvious that her behaviour is deteriorating and they & she are struggling.

Today, she kicked her 1:1 and tried to pull or pinch her arm, it isn't too clear. She did hurt the 1:1 because she wears piedro boots, and the soles of those are really hard.

I asked what they did in response, but they seemed a bit vague. She apparently refused to say sorry.

I took her to apologise, which she did. But what else can I do? They didn't phone me at the time, and DD1 can't understand abstract consequence. She needs here and now stuff. It was too late.

I did ask if they write incident reports, and suggested that they start logging any behaviour which results in them getting hurt, so that the LA Inco actually gives them support.

I feel so bad. I know she is only 4, and has LD, but preschool staff shouldn't get hurt when they go to work either

Any ideas from those that have been there, done that, got the t-shirt would be greatly appreciated.

Lou, that "incident" book should have clear columns - in the first, exactly what she was doing, who was near her, what was occuring in the room - really detailed. Second column, behaviour. Third colunmn, exactly how they dealt with it - including language used and who dealt with it. It's an insane level of paperwork, but you shouldn't have to do it for too long until you see a pattern - I've used the technique a lot.

That's useful evidence though, lou. DS has also had similar incidents at school and I wish they'd been more thorough in logging everything.

Hopefully, once she is in proper SN school, the staff will be able to support her better. What is the transition plan like?

Oh I wish it was that detailed, bigweehag. Instead it is 'DD1 wanted x, and couldn't have it so she screamed and cried', or 'DD1 wanted to do this, and we said no, so she threw herself to the ground'.

One thing I have noticed that one of the 'incidents' today was around milk. DD1 loves milk, and they have it in little cartons. They can have 1 per day. But I think sometimes they let DD1 have 2. I know they did so when OFSTED inspected, for example, to avoid a meltdown. So, of course, she gets upset because sometimes she can have 2 and other times they say no.

They need training, mate. Is DD there next year too?

Yes, I agree, BigWeeHag. The Portage worker has said as much today. She reckons if they weren't restraining DD1 to get her to sit with the group, the teacher wouldn't have been kicked. Makes sense.

She isn't there next year. She is 4.6, so starts her Special school placement in September.

And that is what is so frustrating about the system we operate in.

If I had left it to the area Inco, DD1 may not yet even have a statement. She may have been fobbed off with an IPA (Hants answer to statementing - everyone gets an "Inclusion Partnership Agreement" instead).

DD1 would certainly not have got her special school placement, because they have already told me that by the time the Statement came through, the school would have been (and is now) full.

So, here we are in June 2010, when she starts school in September 2010.

You can guarantee that it would be "Oh goodness, DD1 needs a statement. An IPA was OK, but now DD1 has changed, and we need a statement to provide for her needs. What she really needs is a Special school placement."

"Didn't I say that all along?"

"Yes, but then, Mrs lou031205, your DD1 didn't need it. It would have been fine to send her to mainstream with 30 minutes support on an IPA. We couldn't have forseen that with minimally trained staff your DD1 could deteriorate like this. What she needs is a Special school place..."

"OK, let's organise one of those!"

"...Oh dear, Mrs lou031205, there is a problem. There actually aren't any special school places left."

Can you imagine the state I'd be in if I hadn't been on this board, learning that the only way to get anything done is to do it yourself??

Thank goodness you were here!

They shouldn't be physically restraining without training and documentation, BTW, it's illegal. I imagine the kids are too small for Team Teach, but the principles are still sound for any age group - maybe you could suggest it to them?