I am being unreasonable - help me calm down & deal with DD's SENCO effectively

[Katymac]

She has been effectively blind and in school since 1st March

She has been having 2 hrs a week support regularly for PE/Games

She has occasional support for assessments

She has a 5 minute check in each day with a LSA

On 14th May I was told she has 25 hrs a week support approved by the "Single Area Panel" for "Sudden and Significant Medical (SSM)"

Since then I have had emails qualifying that saying it's only in principle, it has to be approved at County, then 2 dated 27th May:
"Some good news, support of 25 hours per week until the end of the term in July 2010 has been awarded. I then need to resubmit with continuing evidence to ensure continuing support for September 2010. The confirmation came to me by email last night after being awarded by the funding panel above SAP.
I am on the case to ensure this support is in place for our return after the half-term break and will move as quickly as physically possible."
& 7th June
"XXX have just in the last half hour telephoned to officially confirm that funding of 25 hours has been allocated to support DD"

So what do I do now - I have a meeting to discuss this nonexistent support with the SENCO

What should I say

What happened?

Why are you confused by the 2 emails & "I can assure that we are all doing our very best within the constraints within which we work to meet DD's needs and will always endeavour to do so."

So I sent back
"I do understand that you are trying to meet her needs, however the highly emotive state both DD & I are in affects our view of the whole situation; if I have offended or put peoples backs up by being demanding I do apologise.

I spoke to XX Parent Partnership who have suggested that an IEP is appropriate.

I am really trying not to let my emotional state affect the relationships I have with the professionals I need to help DD.

I look forward to seeing you on Friday."

Not very grown up I admitt

honestly, katymac, you need to get assertive.

you need ot lay aside the emotional stuff (always give people a let out - they can jsut say "there, there, don't worry your little head, we're doing our best") and you need to start stating facts - lay out what youwant for dd, and how they are not meeting htis (they arenot even managing to give her the provision they offered, fgs!)

ask if she thinks itis appropriate that another pupil is acting as your dds carer and TA?

whether she thinks LEA would be interested in hearing that?

what the health and safety implications are if, for eg, your dd is in the corridor whrn the fire alarm goes off - how is she supposed ot cope?

what her insurance policay says about disabled students being left ot get around school by themselves.

get tough.

it is your dds only chance

Tee hee - I did really well

I phoned the parent partnership who phoned the SEN caseworker who went off on one because the money she had allocated wasn't being used & I got a lovely email from the SENCO all about writing an IEP on Friday

And they have organised someone to go on the big end of year trip with her (a non teaching member of staff) and they told me this less than an hour after my note to school

I know you are right btw but I hate getting arsey with people

well done in getting what you have.

now for the rest.

I know that there isno long term decisions on your dds condition, but this could well mean she is going back in Sept with the same issues. get it all ironed out now, this term - all set up the way it shouldbe, otherwise it will be another wasted term after the summer.

all this stuff is easy to cancel if she does not need it then, but as you are seeing, takes an age ot put in place.

keep pushing.

you don't need ot be arsey - ask the questions, sit back, and wait for the answer. if you get waffley bullshit, smile, say "well that's all well and good, but how do you propose to answer my question" and then wait some more.

don't takeno for an answer. if you don't fight now, your dds education will suffer.

a statement can take up to 6months to put in place, and that is if everyone agrees - my dd's took 2.5 years. realistically, she will not have a statement this side of Christmas - are oyu happy for this situation to continue until then? is your dd's friend's parents?

That's it silverfrog - I am working through one step at a time

Luckily I am a provider so I have a SEN code of practise plus the toolkit and other documents & yesterday I got them all out & started working through

I have had to stop thinking like a mum and start thinking like a nursery manager

I know the answers to most of this stuff (at least I damn well should) But I forgot in the upset that the rules are the same for 12 yos as they are for 2 yos.

I am also pulling in all the favours I have with the "powers that be" - I have done stuff for loads of people & I am getting pay back now

I may also be trading training for results it's my time & it' valuable and fortunately other people want it

So I phoned Parent Partnership & I got in touch with the SEN caseworker & I got in touch with the CAF lady

And all of a sudden things started happening

This week SENCO
Next week DLA
Week after statement

I can only do one lot of stuff at a time

as you are finding, katymac, it is very different viewing it form the other side of the fence.

good that things are moving.

don't take anyhitng for granted htough - write it all down, send emails "just to clarify" -get a paper trail.

usually, it is only when there is proof that things start moving.

Can I assure you when I get support for a child they get the bloody support - before the money arrives normally

sorry, katymac, didn't mean to imply anyhting.

but - one short look at the SN board surely shows you how unusual you are?

honestly, if there is nothing in writing, the LA won't do anything. if the LA aren't on the case, most schools won't do anything.

it is sadly the way it is.

BUt i will shut up with the unwanted advicenow

I didn't mean it like that

Honest

I meant it like "well if I can manage when it comes out of my pocket why the hell can't the bloody professionals spend money that isn't even theirs on children that need it"

If that makes sense

I just don't 'get' it, it is beyond my comprehension

oh, my fault, sorry

She just got report: I am astounded

English --,5b, 5b, 5c 5c
Maths , 4a, , 6c 5c
Science 4b, 4a, 5a, 6a 5c

The grade in bold is her target for the end of year - she missed a few assessments but I am amazed she has done so well