When my son started school 7 years ago he had terrible problems in his reception year so the school sought the help of the educational psychologist etc. He brought in a support worker and she worked one to one with my son and also taught the school some strategies on how to cope with his behaviour.
He had been experiencing problems since he was about 2 years old, but I had gotten used to being fobbed off by the GP and his nursery had been sort of coping with him, so I just put it down to him being 'difficult'.
School gradually managed to learn to cope and I was told by the local CAMHS department that he didn't have adhd. They didn't conduct a proper assessment - I was just given a Conners Rating Scale to complete - as was his class teacher.
The years went by and things didn't really improve at home and we continued to struggle. His school were very good and most of the teachers there are very talented and soon learned how to handle him. There were hiccups, but nothing terrible. My son is also keen to learn and has no delinquency problems, so he remains quite popular with the teachers.
We eventually got to the end of our tether at home and approached CAMHS again, only to be fobbed off by some snotty support worker. So, I went private. I took him to one of the leading places in the UK for another assessment and they told me that he did have adhd, but was managing to hide it to a large extent at school due to his high iq. They said that he didn't need any medication at that point, but might start to struggle educationally in secondary school.
We continued to struggle and my husband was made redundant due to the stress. I couldn't afford to return to the private clinic for the follow up appointments.
I approached CAMHS again 18 months ago and they spoke to the school who assured them that everything was just peachy pink and my son was a pleasure to teach. No problems with his behaviour at all and basically just sat there smiling throughout the meeting.
However, a parent support worker attacked my son in the playground a few months ago and she was subsequently told she couldn't return to the school. She had objected to the way my son was playing with another boy and had thought my son was attacking this other boy. There was another incident a few months ago and when I went up to see his teacher on parents night she was full of complaints about him talking too much, not being able to concentrate etc. etc. etc.
I felt like SCREAMING!!!!!! All the school have done is cover up his problems in front of the CAMHS people, yet are full of complaints to me!!!!! All I can think of is that they want to restrict the number of children on their SEN register to bolster their Ofsted Report which is currently 'outstanding'.
My husband and I have had parenting assessments done and the parent support advisor has said that we don't have any parenting problems and that my son is still having difficulties so therefore needs yet another adhd assessment.
I don't know what to do or which way to turn.
Any advice? How can the school be permitted to wreck our lives like this? Why do CAMHS take so much notice of them yet not of us?
Sorry for the long post.