Aspergers and making choices

[Flamesparrow]

Trying to work out if this is an AS thing, or a DD1 being bloody annoying thing.

When given several choices (well, any choices tbh) she is completely floored and says she can't make the decision (won't let anyone else make it either). The more options, the worse she is.

If it is an AS thing then I can sort of make allowances etc, if it is just her being awkward then I know I can try to help train her out of it iyswim.

I think it can be but it can also be quite normal. Processing information can cause problems for ASD children and I know it can certainly get DS would up but it is also a problem for lots of children - kid in the sweet shop dilemma!

How old is she? What sort of choices are you talking about? I would limit the choices to two and use straightforward language e.g. juice or water, park or pool? That sort of thing.

DS can panic about making decisions and worries about making the wrong one. Keep it simple and give her time and see how you get on!

It is a trait of the autism spectrum that we can't easily make choices, yes. I'm generalising, because there'll always be a few who can. But give me a set of choices and I'll either have to choose what I had before, or what the person in front of me is having. I'm totally unable to evaluate the choices. Especially if there is a social outcome of some sort where it might lead people to think badly/differently of me if I choose the wrong thing.

If I'm any good as an example, it really helps me to have just two things, and be offered them one at a time, e.g. do you want this....or this? Rather than "which of these two do you want" or "what do you want?"

That's what my Aspie is like amberlight, he can choose but needs limited clear options.
Food, entertainment, options in general.
Likewise with work, he needs to be set up to do a homework task, or one at school with a clear structure and an understanding of what the expectations are, and the parameters.
All his class are given the levelled descriptors detailing the different aspects that are required for a level 6, 7 or 8 in a subject. It works very well for him.
If it's some random, woolly 'Write an essay about' the difference can be from an E to an A, because he doesn't know how to start.

I think it is too. We were always told to limit choices to two at the beginning and then 3 never more. seems to work.

Maybe if you decide on specific criteria to break down the possible number of potential choices. Like a filtering mechanism. eg when moving house you decide which part of the country then which town then if you need walking distance of station then bedroom numbers etc etc until there really are not a lot of choice left

I know that it's one of the adaptations to my teaching that I usually make if I have a child on the spectrum in my class. Writing frames and the like.
It's not a reflection on their intelligence at all, just that information needs presenting in the most appropriate way.
Good point though Flamesparrow, I do have some interesting debates working out what is spectrum, and what is annoying teenager!

Ds2 can get overloaded with too many choices.
However probably due to him anyway I tend to limit choices for all my dc's ( even though ds1 and dd are NT) as it generally makes my life easier.

in the outside world, say a school fair etc where there are lots of choices, ds2 can have moments and this has caused him to run about in circles touching all that is on offer and then heading in to a melt down.

What wedo with outings if we know what some of thechoices are ( for example we went to Alton towers the other weekend) we have a look at what is on offer and the dc's all make a choice and plan what they want to do.. Before we get there!
So when we get there ds2 knows what is going on and what is going to happen.

Hth

Dd3 is undx but being assessed for aspergers, we have real touble with making choices, especially if she needs to be quick, I try to give her enough time but in a crowded shop it's difficult. We don't go in the shop after school very often but she sees all the other kids, so I have to let her occasionally. At home we have the same as starlight where she will add more choices on but with Dd3 she often goes back to what I have said first. I recomend you try to make choosing as calm as possible and give him loads of time so he doesn't feel under pressure.

Sorry just re read your post and shoud have put "her"

Thank you - this helps a lot.

Ds is the opposite he has to have choices. He cant deal with open ended questions. I always offer two, otherwise too many would confuse him too.

My ds seems to know exactly what he wants, and seems to hate limited choices, he just wants what he wants. If we are planning a day out he will want to go to the beach. If he wants something to eat it will a specific food, he seems to crave different things, quite often something as specific as coriander or meat. Basically if I give him a choice he will want something totally different.