We got a diagnosis for DS aged 5 today

[APassionateWoman]

Asperger's. She has referred him for 'further exploration' as she thinks ADHD is 'probable'.

We knew, really, but had not been able to get an official diagnosis until today.

I am one part relieved, one part totally floored by it. We have been fighting for a diagnosis for so long, but now we have it, I also feel very sad.

That's all, really.

Give yourself time. Take care whom you tell lots of people have some rather daft views and you need to protect yourself at this time.
Welcome to the aspie world. Mine's lovely (my aspie that is)

Don't feel you have to 'do' anything at this time. Some like to read lots, some escape, some that they need lots of therapies. Do whatever YOU and your partner think is best for your mental welfare and that of your son. Bugger everyone else for a bit if necessary. You will find that lots of ordinary people will have an opinion. It is quite fun to run a sweepstake to see how soon someone will mention a) Rainman b) that boy (now a man) who did amazing drawings - he was on TV in the early 80s I think c) ask you if your son is good at maths/music/drawing - delete as appropriate.

He's still your lovely little boy and enjoy him.

Regards

I know what you mean by the relief/floored thing. I felt relief that DD would find it easier to get the help which goes with the dx but it felt very final. Up until that point someone could have said well actually it's this and we can sort it out. Asperger's is here to stay and that takes a bit of getting used to.

Just try to focus on the fact the he is still exactly the same child and there is no reason for him not to be very successful in life.

Agree give yourself time to get used to being in a new world, and do be kind to yourself. Getting a dx is hard work and what you might need more than anything is a break from it all.

Nothing's changed about your lovely boy, but once you have that dx it does feel like a bit of a life sentence. (But then this is true of parenthood anyway!)

Sometimes I look at my ds1 and think for all the frustration and sadness of life with him he's still my miracle child, my lovely boy, and it's really good to hold onto that.

APM take it steady and give yourself time to take it in. Niminy's right, nothing has changed with your DS (it took me a few weeks to realise my DS was still the same person as he was befire the dreaded dx and once I got my head round that I felt much better) Can I recommend the parent helpline at the NAS? They talked to us for about 2 hours when DS was dx and were so helpful and of course there is always us lot on here.

He's still the same child, my lovely. The 'label' - well, think of it as more of a map, so that people know where to go and how to get there with him.

PS the huge majority of people, even very nice ones, are ignorant. Ignore this. Educate them if you feel like it,m for the rest, smile shrug and walk off, because it's not your JOB to make them all understand when some of them probably don[t want to, and it's too exhausting to try. Argue with his teachers, doctors, therapists, child carers - don't bother with the woman you met on the bus.