Why does DS always have to do things he is told not to?

[tiredmummyoftwo]

DS (4.9, ASD) has recently started being very cheeky, always doing things he is not supposed to, or told not to. DH and I are always chasing him around to stop him getting upto his mischief. From the moment he was up this morning, he tried to wee everyhere except the toilet, he tries to get the v-day, bin next to the toilet everytime. Then he emptied the toothpaste while I was brushing my teeth. We have got all the toothpaste, shampoo, body wash etc in carrier bags in the bathrooms out of his reach because he will otherwise empty everything. He is always looking out for opportunities to be naughty, eg, turning the tv off whilst everybody watching it,turning the washing machine off, running the water in the bath, emptying the water bottle ( we drink mineral water as water quality is really bad here). The list will go on and on if I try to list everything he does. It's more attention seeking, don't think it's sensory seeking as it's not something he does over and over, it's more our reactions he wants. Both DH and I react, because it's hard not to when he is turning the washing machine off half way through. If we are not watching he will go in front of the washing machine and then tell himself, DS no and turn it off, then starts laughing and giggling. Thing is it's not like he does not understand he is not supposed to. He does and still does things and gets a kick out of it which is driving us crazy. We tell him off and then when he is tired or bored he just repeats what it non-stop like DS don't touch the washing machine, don't touch the tv, don't break winnie the pooh.

Sorry for the rant. Having a bad day with in laws trying my patience.

Dd2 is the same, tips her drink all over the house, climbs on the furniture, puts things down the toilet, takes food and breaks things , its hard work having to follow them around all day shouting 'no' and 'put that back' only to be blanked . For most of the day i have to keep dd2 in the sitting room with the stair gate shut so she can't get up to mischief, i feel guilty that she can't have full run of the house but i havn't got the energy to keep running around after her.

Feel free to rant, it is hard work.

Both my boys do this and, yes, a lot of it is for the reaction. DS2 is almost 4 and is naturally quite compliant, so is fairly easy (compared to what I'm used to with DS1) to distract and re-direct. DS1 is 6 and very hyperactive and a whole different level of headache. He needs strong consequences, and even then will still do something to test us - and then, of course, totally flip his lid when we follow through.

I really feel your pain.

Marne,DS does the flashing down the toilet things, he is obsessed with toilets as it is, so we keep all the toilet doors closed. Problem is DS is very good at working things out, he can open the doors with screw divers or coins. We had to put an entire wall on our hallway because DS was always climbing. He worked out how to open the stair gate within a day at the age of 1 and climbed over it when we tied it up with rope. He always seems a step ahead of us, no matter what we do to stop him, he finds something else to do.

Ouryve, DS is pretty compliant too, so he listens when we are around, but he waits for us to take our eyes off him, he is very sneaky in that way. When he comes downstairs first things he does is checking the front door in case we left the key on the door, twice he got out of the house using the key (lucky that we have a security guard at the compound), we now put bolt on the door out of his reach and I check every hour that it is on. I always feel guilty because poor DD gets no attention from me.

Yep, we have the same problem here with pouring, flushing, tipping etc. I think that once my DS gets the idea in his head to do something, it is like a compulsion - he HAS to do it. It's a bit like if he notices something is 'wrong' or different, he wants it fixed immediately and cannot relax until it is done.