Dd1 wants to stop talking in class but can't, how can i help her, Amber?

[Marne]

Dd1 6 (AS) talks constantly from the moment she wakes until she goes to sleep, she has started to struggle with not finishing her work in time at school and the other children are getting distracted by her constant talking (and getting fed up with her), she is very aware that she talks too much but she says she can't stop herself . Last night she wouldn't go to sleep as she was worried that she would get in trouble at school for talking. I spoke to her teacher this morning and she reasured dd1 that she will not get told off.

Why does dd1 have to talk all the time? i know it is a part of her AS but i don't really understand.

Is there anything i can do to help her control her talking?

I hope lots of people have ideas on this, because I'm truly not sure that there is any one answer. It might help to know what she talks about - is it the same sort of thing all the time, a general ramble, lots of different things?

How does her mind work best? Pictures, symbols, words?

When I worked recently with a 7 yr old lad in a school who would constantly forget not to do X and Y, we used a highly visual method with him and got his classmates to help with it - a simple 'stop' signal and clear word, with no eye contact, then the teacher/TA reminding him what he was supposed to be focused on. It took quite a few repetitions to get him to get out of the habit of doing those things, but we're making really good progress with it.

So perhaps a visual signal that the other children and the teacher can give her could be useful. A picture or particular gesture may just be enough to remind her without the other person needing to speak, thereby prolonging the conversation.

Bless her for wanting to stop so much! It must be really hard when you wold like to do the right thing but can't help yourself.

Hi Marne

This is something my DD2 has struggled with and has got really upset about being told off. Her teacher in yr 3 did exactly what Amber and Al1son have suggested. (BTW this was before any of us were even thinking about AS but the constant talking came up as a problem and the teacher suggested this). The teacher worked out a hand gesture with her that she knew meant stop. This helped to keep reminding her in a non-telling off way and without being too obvious to other children - she is very sensitive about not being the same as the other kids so would not have liked a picture card unless it was used for everyone else too (don't know if this would apply to your DD? It was still hard for her to stop, but the signal kept reminding her to try and although still rather chatty in class she is now much better at self-control. Good that the teacher has reassured her, some of DD2's have not been so helpful and telling her off just makes her more nervous and talk more!

Amber- she talks about anything and everything (from what she did at the weekend, dinosaurs to the volcano erupting in iceland), things that she finds very intersting but others don't. She's not really great with pictures but we have used egg timers in the past and they have worked well.

Combination of red card signals/hand signal, clear 'stop' command, and an egg timer that she can turn over when told to stop and must wait until it's finished before putting her hand up to ask if she can talk again. Unless it is an emergency like desperately needing the loo in which case she can definitely say something. Er, you'd probably need quite a few rules - we're that specific!

Thank you for the great ideas, a hand signal might do the trick.