Argh! What a day!

[thederkinsdame]

Sorry, I just need to have a rant and let off some steam. I have had a really difficult day. My DS has just started speech therapy which I fought really hard for. Today was a nightmare - he threw some toys at the SALT, hitting her on the head and hit her several times. I ended up crying and DS ended up in the corner playing while I shared my worries about his behaviour. It seems to be getting worse, not better, and I feel that I just live and breathe autism at the moment. I have no work on, as no time and all I do is ferry DS to appointments. My friends are drifting away, and I just cannot cope with the idea that this is my life for the next 40 or 50 years. My DH doesn't really understand - he doesn't have to pick him up from nursery and hear about all the bad behaviour, he doesn't have to referee interactions with otehr children, which tend to degenerate into fights, and he doesn't have to do the appointments. Sorry to moan, I know that in the grand scheme of things I don't have it really bad at all, but I have hardly been out the house for the past 2 months as I have been really ill, and today I feel like everything has got on top of me. I feel like going back to work F/T and making DH stay home for 6 months, but we can't afford that as I would only earn about 30% of what he can. Argh!

Okay, is there any way that your DH can apply for flexible working i.e. 3 10 hour days and a half day, giving you 1.5 days for some income-generating/hobby of your own? or part-time?

I think there is an entitlement for all parents of young children to apply?

I must admit when I read about your ds throwing toys at the slt I did rather think 'well I know how he feels actually', but that was with my SLT in mind not yours. I bet that was really frustrating.

Is there anyway this SLT can support an application to SS for respite?

Not really, SMacK, because of the nature of his work. He did say he would try to help with some appts, which would help a lot. I'm looking into respite ATM. Thing is our SALT is absolutely lovely, and really supportive, which just made me feel even worse when she was getting clobbered! Looking on the bright side, at least she has seen for herself what his physical behabviour is like and hopefully she will put it in her SA report. So, ironically, it could help us in the long run!

I feel a bit pathetic moaning, and it doesn't get on top of me often. I'll be OK when the hols are over.

You are feeling how i felt a year ago , i had to give up my job due to both dd's being on the spectrum, i found it hard having to spend all day every day focusing on the dd's and Autism. I have spent many appointments in tears with dd2.

Things have got better, or maybe i have excepted this is my life from now on. I always make sure i get time to myself (which is really important), just a few hours where i can do what i like without the dd's, sometimes i just sit in a cafe and have a coffee in peace .

Marne, I'm glad to hear things get better. It's still early days for us. We're not even a year post-dx yet, so it's still raw at times. You are right, I do need to get time to myself. I am running on empty at the moment, that's why I'm ill. It's a message that I need to look after myself, I think!

I feel exactly the same, butb then we're on school hols so in that nasty resettling routine period

Would offer you choccy and a glass of soemthing strong we re you close

I found things started moving (a tiny bit but am more hopeful now than have been) when I fronted up to a senior bod after an attack and made her look at my cuts. I hope the SLT thing ahs the same effect for you

Thanks, Clarissimo. Much appreciated. Chocs and a strong drink would be perfect now LOL. Glad to hear things started moving for you, even if you did have to have cuts. I know what you mean about the hols, I dread them! Have already started planning how we're going to survive summer hols. [wink}

I know how I am survining summere

bought a quiet chair for the garden and soome gin

thankfully dh works from home for the next two summers, dreading after

LOL. Sounds lovely. Can I come and camp at yours over August?!

Only if you'll join me in takingthe kids to village events so we can watch the locals flee

Sounds fun, if I bring my DS along, we can go in force and scare them to death!

Excellent, after being introduced this week to what will be forever spoken of in hushed tones as The Dunelm Mill Meltdown ( shrunk teh curtains, there was no option.... actually I don't know if I shrunk the curtains and the lining stayed the same, or stretched the lining and the curtains stayed the same: eiether way they were now hideous).

Went soemthing along the lines of eyes roll back, hunker down, jump on heels, flap, squawk, run randommly at siblings pushing and hitting for @ half an hour.

We have of course had therapeutic wine, and as we have guests today (oh bugger- but it is my oldest friend, ds4 is 2 Wednesday and she is his Godmother) more wine will be taken tonight. I will be good a for a few days after though (aka no wine left )