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Having another baby after having a child with SN

1 reply

rebl · 28/03/2010 21:20

I'm a lurker on here and have posted occasionally and you've always been so great . Basically its as title says. I'm very broody (probably due to everyone around me having babies). I have twins (nearly 4 yo). My dd has migraines and although this isn't a major issue it does clock up the hospital appointments. But my ds has a large number of problems. He has congential hearing loss, duodenal ulcers, severe reflux, still classed with chronic failure to thrieve, multiple food intolerances, speech and language delay, not potty trained and now dr's think that there is a medical reason for this and he might never be. He also had gross motor skill development delay which required physio but that has been mainly sorted. He has an average of 2 appointments a week. He is reguarly hospitalised as well. We have no family close by to help.

So I have my hands full but then I can't get this broodyness to go away. DH is open to the suggestion. We also don't have an overall diagnosis for ds but all the drs feel that there is a genetic factor involved. We are worried that any subsequent child/ren could have similar problems to ds. Without a diagnosis we can't have antinatal tests though. Our other major stopping thing though is how we would cope with a baby and ds.

Are there others here that have had another after having a sn child? How have you managed to juggle it all and are you happy? Have you had the situation where you dont' have a diagnosis but they thought it was genetic and then had a baby?

OP posts:
Jo5677 · 28/03/2010 21:51

Hi, so sorry to hear about the problems your son has.
My eldest daughter has a terminal condition and has quadriplegic cerebal palsy.
Anyway, i have gone on to have 4 more children since, one of my son's has ASD.
I was worried that my other childern might be affected or have similar issues but i guess i've been blessed and lucky as 3 of my 5 children are all fine.

My eldest daughter is 12 and in a wheelchair and my youngest is almost 2 and still reliant on a pushchair a lot. This is the hardest part for me, having 2 children, one that can't walk at all and another that can't yet walk far.
It has been tough at times, especially as after my 4th was born and i became a single Mum for quite a while (met someone else and got married and had baby number 5 since ).
The kids all apprecaite having each other though, and despite the hard times it has been totally worth it all.

Everyones situation is different though...i'd currently like one last child,despite everyone thinking i'm nuts (i've learnt not to care what 'people' think . I manage to juggle well though and the kids are all very happy and very loved. I'm glad i didn't listen to other people, or i'd be without my other 4 wonderful children now.I only have a Mum that lives half an hour away and works fulltime herself, but my husband is very supportive and helps a lot with appointments etc.

I know i haven't had the worry about the possibility of my daughters condition being genetic but i wish you all the best with it all, really feel for you. I hope you do get a diagnosis for your son.
Take care, Jo.

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