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Dentist from hell

12 replies

claw3 · 19/03/2010 10:58

Ds had a check up with the dentist this morning, he has to see the Community dentist because he is orally defensive and has to have any work done under GA. About 6 months he had to have 4 teeth removed under GA because of decay. (no sensory dentist in my area)

Ds's diet is extremely limited, he will only eat sweet things and getting ds to drink anything at all is a big problem. He also grinds his teeth terribly and brushing his teeth is such a performance, he screams, refuses to open his mouth etc, so brushing is limited.

Dentist has made me feel like a terrible parent and as if i am neglecting ds. He gives me the same lecture everytime we visit.

'You do know that your ds's poor diet, drinks and not brushing, is going to cause further tooth decay'

'Yes i am aware of what causes tooth decay'

'You need to cut out all the sweet things from his diet and get him to drink water or milk'

'sweet things are the only thing that ds eats if i cut them out there would be nothing left and he refuses to drink water or milk'

'You need to continuing trying'

'I am, ds is under dietitian, feeding clinic, OT and i am following their advice'

(hands me a leaflet detailing which foods are the best to eat) 'Make an effort to get him to eat things from that list and only let him drink water or milk and start using an adult toothpaste'

'I have tried using adult toothpastes and the flavour is too strong for ds to tolerate'

'You need to follow my advice if you want to prevent further tooth decay'

He is really getting on my nerves.

I feel like putting my fingers in my ears and singing la, la, la, la whenever he talks.

How would you deal with him?

OP posts:
thederkinsdame · 19/03/2010 11:18

Poor you, claw3. I would very politely point out that although you appreciate his input that he may like to discuss things with your OT and dietician so that he can get a better inderstanding of the challenges you are facing and of the sensory issues DS has. I would also say that he needs to discuss it with them to think of some alternative strategies, as he is approaching it from the angle of a NT child and he needs to consider DS's disability when offering solutions.

genieinabottle · 19/03/2010 11:20

I would be blunt i think... something along the lines of 'my DS has special needs and believe me i am doing the best i can!'

How irritating it must be to listen to him, let alone probably not making you feel great about it all.

claw3 · 19/03/2010 11:29

I have given him a copy of dietitians report and recommendations. I doubt he has read it, perhaps i should just reply 'read the report' every time he speaks to me!

I am coming very close to being extremely blunt with him.

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fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 19/03/2010 14:07

i'd say..."OK, thanks very much", take the leaflet and then do just what you are doing!

Makes for an easier life!

haggisaggis · 19/03/2010 14:13

Claw - re the toothpaste - you've probably tried it already but my dd hates strong tasting toothpastes and was still on kids ones when I bought Colgate Sensitive Fresh Stripe. It has a much sweeter, spearminty flavour than teh other adult toothpastes and she likes it. (so do I actually)

Pixel · 19/03/2010 15:13

Ds's dentist is very nice and quite understanding, but she still gives me the lecture on drinks/sugar etc etc every time we visit, although after the struggle we had last time just to look at his teeth she has given up on the 'regular brushing' one and complimented me by saying his oral hygiene was very good 'considering' .

I must admit that nowadays I tend to look attentive and nod a few times rather than try and defend myself, as I know I'm doing all I can. His last check-up was 3 days before Christmas and I was nodding and smiling whilst thinking about all the sweets and chocolate he was about to consume, thanks to loving relatives who don't know what else to buy him!

Marne · 19/03/2010 16:25

I agree with Fanjo, smile and say 'thank you very much' then go outside and scream .

claw3 · 19/03/2010 16:33

Haggis, thanks for the suggestion, but ds doesnt do minty, i have managed to find a fruity one with high fluoride and he can tolerate the tiniest amount, if i can manage to get him to open his mouth in the first place!

Pixel, we havent even got to the opening his mouth stage at the dentist yet, we are still at the just sitting in the chair and looking at the equipment stage after a year. They only knew he needed work doing because he developed 2 abscess and his face was all swollen.

You would think this would give the dentist a clue as to how difficult brushing is!

Fanjo, thanks la, la, la, it is then

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Pixel · 19/03/2010 18:52

Ds doesn't open his mouth voluntarily unfortunately. It's a case of me sitting in the chair with him and trying to hold him still whilst sticking my finger in his mouth as if he's a horse. It's not ideal but desperate measures were called for after he had to have 7 teeth out under GA and I felt so guilty. He'll soon be too big and strong so I don't know what we'll do then as he just won't co-operate. I don't think he's frightened as he's quite happy to jump on and off the chair and fiddle with the computer in the surgery!

wigglybeezer · 19/03/2010 21:03

Claw, what fruity one have you found, I would love to buy some for DS3 as tesco's have stopped doing the strawberry or banana ones I used to buy?

wigglybeezer · 19/03/2010 21:07

Ps. I only got the lecture once and burst into tears (had put off going to the dentist due to the state of DS3's teeth), she has been nice to me ever since and DS3's teeth have not got any worse (he has dodgy enamel and a hatred of toothpaste).

claw3 · 20/03/2010 09:15

Wiggly, its 'Little Miss Chatterbox' berry gel from Asda, has 1350 ppmF.

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