we've just been through all this and had diagnosis of Aspergers last week for DS who is 6 1/2.
Our first appointment was with a Paediatrician and a Speech and Language chap. At this stage I thought DS had ADHD.
At this app the Speech chap took DS off to another room. DS later reported he had a great time and kept asking for weeks when he was going to play with Tom again (bless
Whilst DS was off with Tom, the paediatrician asked us to start from the beginning - what pregnancy was like, what the birth was like, how he was as a baby, a lot about things like when he first spoke, before he spoke could he make his needs felt by pointing or babbling, how was eye contact, questions about imaginative play etc.
I had got thie referral via the GP who had already asked me to write down my areas ofr concern. I filled 3 sides of A4....... she had sent this to the Paed so they already had it, but I took it with me as well. I also took copies of everything I had sent them in response to the letter they had sent informing me of the appointment - strengths and difficulties questionnaires etc, and copies of school reports.
We were there about 2 hours, and DS wasnt in the room for this whole chat bit. Tom (speech man) brought him back in at some point and they quickly realised we werent done and they took him off again. When they did come back they chatted to us about what Tom had observed and mentioned Aspergers. DS was in the room for this bit but it was all over his head.
The second appointment last week they did an ADOS (Autistic Diagnostic Observation Score or something) because they felt they needed to do another assessment to assess if it was autism or not. This was lots of engineered little scenarios where Tom wrote down how DS behaved and they then produce a score which, as I understand it, if its higher than a certain level indicates ASD. This appointment was also 2 hours and this time they got a nurse to take DS to the waiting room while they delivered their diagnosis and gave us a bit of time to digest it and ask questions and so on.
Before both these appointments we told DS we were going to see some people who would help us to be better parents and help him the best we could, so we turned it into something about us, not him. He wasnt anxious at all, and abxiety is one of his "things"
Good luck with your appointment. Just realised its tomorrow so you wont have read this before you go, but good luck anyway
Jillxo